Charas-Project

Off-Topic => All of all! => Topic started by: Dragonium on August 21, 2005, 12:13:00 PM

Title: Don't you just hate it when...
Post by: Dragonium on August 21, 2005, 12:13:00 PM

Many people have probably seen this before, but in case you haven't...

 - When people say "Oh, you want to have your cake and eat it too". Well, duh. What the hell is the point of a cake if you're not going to eat it?

 - When you're at a cinema and people say "Did you see that?". Nope, I was watching the floor, thanks. That's what I paid for, after all.

 - People who say "Can I ask you a question?". Did you give me much chance?

 - People who point at their wrist when they want to know the time. Yeah, I know that's where my watch is, idiot. Do I point at my crotch when I want to go to the toilet?

 - People who say "I don't mean to interrupt, but...". Then shut up. It's so damn simple.

 - When someone asks "Are you in the queue?". No, I'm standing here for the good of my health, buddy. Why are you here?

 - When a person searches the entire room to find the remote, because they refuse to just, say, walk to the TV and change the channel.

 - "It's always in the last place you look". What the hell? Am I going to keep looking after I've found it?

 - When something is "New and Improved". Which is it? If it's new, then there has never been anything before it. If it's an improvement, then there must have been something before it.

 - When people say "Life is short". What the hell can you do that's longer?

 - You are waiting for the bus, and someone asks "Has the bus come yet?". If the bus came, would I be standing here?

 - When a person says something like "My eyes aren't what they used to be". What were they before? Ears? Your shoes?

 - You're eating something, and someone asks "Is that nice?". No, it's disgusting. That's why I'm eating it.

 - "I'm going to the toilet". Thanks for that.

 - When the McDonalds staff pretend not to understand you if you don't add "Mc" to what you want. Yeah, well, I'll have a McStraw and jam it in your McEyes, McMoron.

 - When you have an accident and someone says "Are you alright?". Yes, I'm fine. I'll just grab my limbs and go, shall I?

Feel free to add any. :)

Title:
Post by: Ace of Spades on August 21, 2005, 12:17:16 PM

"I could care less" COULD care less? What is that supposed to mean? It's "I couldN'T care less."

Title:
Post by: ~*Sweet Ichifo*~ on August 21, 2005, 12:18:36 PM

-When you're obsessed with a band/show and have tons of merchandise, and someone asks "Do you like _________?"
No, I hate them. Thats why I have all this stuff.



XD

Those are great..so great..


@Ace: That means they care, but they're still capable of caring less about the situation than they already do.

Title:
Post by: Dragonium on August 21, 2005, 12:20:20 PM

Haha. Cool.

Title:
Post by: Ace of Spades on August 21, 2005, 12:24:26 PM

"Hey, you got a haircut" Thanks for telling me something that I already know.

Title:
Post by: ~*Sweet Ichifo*~ on August 21, 2005, 12:26:11 PM

hahahahaha..great one Ace. Same with stuff like 'You got a new puppy!'

Title:
Post by: Drace on August 21, 2005, 02:07:00 PM

Funny, but I've seen this before.

Title:
Post by: Grandy on August 21, 2005, 02:52:49 PM

 "Why is plan 'B' aways better?" ...probaly because if plan A worked, you wouldn't use it?

Title:
Post by: maxine on August 21, 2005, 02:54:01 PM

Quote

Originally posted by Dragonium
- When a person searches the entire room to find the remote, because they refuse to just, say, walk to the TV and change the channel.

I cant actually agree with that one.. I always look after the remote just cuz its more comfortable too have it when the show is over and when i am tired and wanna shut the tv off.

Title:
Post by: Bluhman on August 21, 2005, 04:57:09 PM

You dyed your hair and someone comes up to you, noticing the dyed hair, and asking what color it is...

Title:
Post by: RPG LORD on August 21, 2005, 05:24:23 PM

I find it annoying when my sis keeps asking question. 'What's...What's...What's...' UGH!!
'Seems you like reading comic books (fact)...' Then why would I have such a big collection? Oh well.

Title:
Post by: Dragonium on August 21, 2005, 05:27:18 PM

"What's that?".

Care to narrow that down a little, moron?

Title:
Post by: White Dwarf on August 21, 2005, 05:42:58 PM

"Hey, that guy just..."

Well yeh, we can see to you know

"Did you just..."

No, I have no control over my actions and dont know what i did.

Title:
Post by: dragoninja on August 21, 2005, 05:47:52 PM

when you are reading a book and someone asks "what are you reading?" A book, perhaps?

when you offer some sweets/candy to someone "is it for me?" No! I was just holding in front of your face to see if you'd start drooling :p

When you are sitting on the bus and someone points at the empty seat beside you and asks "Is this seat taken?" what a stupid question! what does it look like!?

(like the first one) when you are f.e drawing something and someone asks "what are you doing?" Gee... -_- what does it look like? I'm tap dancing

oh, and this one: tell them to be quiet and they say "Ok"... ARGH! Shut up!

Title:
Post by: Dominant on August 21, 2005, 06:35:19 PM

My little brother exists.

Title:
Post by: Sephiroth12317 on August 21, 2005, 06:43:08 PM

Not sure if someone said this one but here we go...."Hey what are you watching on TV?". Uh why dont you just look! Or how about this? "Oh Im sorry were you doing something?" I dont know was I? :D Happens to me everyday

Title:
Post by: Drace on August 21, 2005, 06:53:35 PM

Quote

Originally posted by maxine

quote:

Originally posted by Dragonium - When a person searches the entire room to find the remote, because they refuse to just, say, walk to the TV and change the channel.

I cant actually agree with that one.. I always look after the remote just cuz its more comfortable too have it when the show is over and when i am tired and wanna shut the tv off.

Me too, but mostly because the TV downstairs volume can only be controlled by the remote. Damn thing.

Title:
Post by: AsakuraHao2004 on August 21, 2005, 06:58:31 PM

"Legally drunk" Well if it's legal, what's the fuckin problem?

"Who gives a rat's a$s?" Well who wants to recieve one?!

"The country is going down the tubes?" What tubes? Where are these tubes? And where do they go?

"He takes the cake." Where do you take a cake, the movies?

"Oh, I'd be more than happy to do that?" To me this sounds like a dangerous mental condition. "We had to put Dave in the mental home. He was ... 'more than dandy'".

"Tell us, in your own words.." DO you have your own words? I'm using the same words everyone else is using! Next time they tell you to say something in your own words, say "Nit flut blarney quando floooooooooooo."

~George Carlin

Title:
Post by: FFL2and3rocks on August 21, 2005, 07:50:25 PM

When I yell "OW!" and someone asks me "Are you hurt?" No, I just like yelping in pain. It's fun.

Title:
Post by: RPG LORD on August 21, 2005, 07:53:25 PM

lol, just like I like claiming I went to sleep at 6 AM..

Title:
Post by: Trevlac on August 21, 2005, 08:30:32 PM

This is like a collection of "Here's your sign" jokes.

After going to a self-serve cafeteria bar someone points to a food item on your plate "Are you going to eat that?" No, see I got it just so that all the fatties here wouldn't over eat. (What's extra insulting is the fact that the person asking you that is probably fat XD)

I'm in an Internet/Network Security class, when I go on break in the cafeteria people approach me and look at my ID card which has my class on it.

"So, you like computers?"

Nope, I came to Tech school to destroy all their electronics.

Title:
Post by: Moosetroop11 on August 21, 2005, 08:37:41 PM

"What do you want, I'm busy."

There's a contradiction for ya 0_o

Title:
Post by: FFL2and3rocks on August 21, 2005, 08:40:58 PM

"Hey, are you awake?"
"I am now, jerk!"

Title:
Post by: charaman on August 21, 2005, 08:50:17 PM

Quote

Originally posted by Trevlac
This is like a collection of "Here's your sign" jokes.

beat me to it.

Title:
Post by: Drace on August 22, 2005, 12:11:36 AM

When a guy robs the bank and says: "Give me all your money!" No, you go and rob the bank for a quarter.

Title:
Post by: coasterkrazy on August 22, 2005, 12:20:54 AM

When someone says, "With all due respect..." or "No offense, but..." it usually means they are about to say something disrespectful or offensive. I have to say I'm often guilty of this one.

Something that annoys me that people do is ask something like, "Which one do you think?" I'll give my opinion and they'll go and make their own choice anyway. So... why ask!?

Title:
Post by: Drace on August 22, 2005, 12:24:34 AM

Whe your house is full of boxes and there iss a U-Haul truck in your driveway and then your neighbor comes over and says, "Hey, you moving?" Nope. We just pack our stuff up once or twice a week to see how many boxes it takes.

EDIT: When someone get's pulled over by the police and asks "Did I do something wrong officer?" No, we are giving out tickets to people for doing things right

Title:
Post by: Razor on August 22, 2005, 09:25:41 AM

Bill Engvale rocks áss.

So I'm out at the park, flying a kite, and some guy comes up to me and says "You flyin' that there kite?" so I say to him "Nah, I'm fishin' for birds."

Title:
Post by: shinotebasiiackh on August 22, 2005, 10:02:50 AM

When you're breaking up with someone, and they ask "Does this mean we'll never see each other again?"

No, dumbass, I want to break up to streangthen the relationship!

Quote

Originally posted by RPG LORD
lol, just like I like claiming I went to sleep at 6 AM..

I wish I was only claiming it...

Title:
Post by: dragoninja on August 22, 2005, 09:43:43 PM

Oh, I just remembered: there was this car crash and then someone asked "what happened?"
two cars crashed! what does it look like?

and this one is pretty old but: "did it hurt when you fell from the tree?"
NO!!! it hurted when I landed! the actual falling I didn't feel... -_-

Title:
Post by: Pythis on August 23, 2005, 02:58:42 AM

When your still eating and someone asks "Oh would you like more" Okay just dont let me finish eating Okay?

Title:
Post by: Drighton on August 23, 2005, 01:53:42 PM

I hate it when people take advantage of the express lane just because its open.

Just because the thing says "15 items or less" doesn't mean you can race the guy with two items over there then take for-freaking-ever to check out while I'm sitting there with my two items.

And it doesn't stop at that. You can have two items and be standing behind a whole slew of 15 item carts. Then the loser wastes time fishing for exact change,or starts disputing the price of an item, or pays with a check and the lady has to do her "90 on 1" crap and wait for some other lady to turn a key. You do that in a regular lane, not the express lane! Thats why its called the express lane jerk, because it supposed to go faster than the other lanes!!

I just wanted to buy a drink!!! I'm paying with a credit card! In, swipe, out! I wasn't devoting my whole day to this!

Oh, and what really steams me is when the "15 item" cart had like 18 items in it and the moron starts acting all "Oh, there are 18 items!? I thought I only counted 15. Hmmm. Isnt that wierd. *moronic chuckle*" Honestly, who CAN"T count to 15!?

Here is a general rule I hope everyone will follow so I don't snap on you one day.
If you can't carry what your buying in your hands, DONT GET IN THE EXPRESS LANE!!!!


/vent off (i feel better now)

Title:
Post by: Drace on August 23, 2005, 01:59:13 PM

I only race people if I have 2 or 3 things. But that's mostly because I'm in a hell of a hurry.

Title:
Post by: Drighton on August 23, 2005, 02:02:16 PM

Quote

Originally posted by Drace
I only race people if I have 2 or 3 things. But that's mostly because I'm in a hell of a hurry.

Ah yes, but you can carry what your buying in your hands. Express-lane etiquette says that you can race someone then.

Title:
Post by: X_marks_the_ed on August 23, 2005, 02:18:34 PM

Why is it even called an "express" lane? I see people put food back and buy just the maximum, just to get in. It's always the express lanes that are the most un-expressful.

BTW, Don't you hate it when...

People save spots for others in line. Then say "I was saving it for a friend." What? Is your friend matter more to you than my life. I'm starving, and your friend can get in front of me because he's your friend? Weak. Just weak. The line moves every two minutes, because the "special" kids get to the front of the line, and teachers don't even have to get in line. They just walk to the side of the line and grab whatever they can get their filthy hands on. I hate my school!!

Title:
Post by: Drace on August 23, 2005, 02:19:05 PM

Muahahaha! But serouisly, I onlt race if I need to go to school soon-ish or work or stuff like that. Mostly I race then with a Dr. Pepper and something to eat.

Title:
Post by: Drighton on August 23, 2005, 02:24:52 PM

Ha, i live at the source. Dr Pepper, bottled in Texas :D

I work in an inlet inside a grocery store, so when I'm hungry I just go out and grab stuff. Of course, I don't have the luxury of waiting in line because I have to answer the phone and deal with customers, so I need to go in and out. It doesn't always work though.

Just like you Drace, I buy a drink and a small snack and end up waiting in line behind some jerk, sometimes having to abandon my place to handle a customer who is waiting at my booth or answer a phonecall, only to go through the whole process again. :(

Quote

Originally posted by X_marks_the_ed
Why is it even called an "express" lane? I see people put food back and buy just the maximum, just to get in. It's always the express lanes that are the most un-expressful.

It would be express if people abided by the no-cart rule. Hell, even take cash out of the equation and you have an even more express lane.

Thats it. I'm changing the way things are done. In Texas, you are liable to get shot if you use a cart or cash in the express lane. :D

Title:
Post by: Sqoad on August 23, 2005, 08:05:04 PM

When a person tries to persuade someone into giving him the gun:
"Give me the gun slowely" - What so YOU have it instead?

When someone wants to taste something:
"Can I taste that?" - Yes if you EAT it....

When you ask someone if they want to have $€)( and the partner answers:
"No I have a headache" - And you just got it for the fortyfifth night? You need a doctor!

Or when the partner ask:
"Wanna play Doctor?" - Does doctor have $€)( with their patiets?

When you are up in a tree some people will say:
"Jump down from that tree!" - So I break a leg!?!

When your child wants a friend to stay over:
"I have invited a friend to stay over. Is that all right?" -  You did WHAT without checking first!?!

Title:
Post by: Dragonchick93 on August 23, 2005, 09:08:54 PM

"Dont wear THAT in school."what?dont wear what?

"Can you get me a cookie?" wha-what the hell dude.the frikin jar is right in front of you!!!!

Title:
Post by: Drace on August 23, 2005, 09:12:08 PM

When you are kissing a girl and her father comes. "What are you doing to my daughter?!" I'm kissing her, duh.

Title:
Post by: Sqoad on August 24, 2005, 12:47:06 AM

When you hurt your nose people always asks:
"What happened to your nose?" - I BIT IT!!!

When you buy at the store they sometimes say:
"Here's the reciept and the change." - What!? Really? I thought it was a bird...

When people walk in to you they sometimes say:
"Watch yourself!" - What about "Sorry" you f***head

When you visit any store les'say the pharmicy they say:
"Come again" - What? You like it when I am sick!?

When you broke a leg the doctor will say:
"Is this the damaged leg?" - No! It is the one that isn't bent to a creepy direction!

Last of all:
"Who are you" - Your death!

Title:
Post by: wildguy3922 on August 24, 2005, 01:10:45 AM

Quote

Originally posted by Drace
When you are kissing a girl and her father comes. "What are you doing to my daughter?!" I'm kissing her, duh.

HOW DID YOU KNOW??????? XD XD

Title:
Post by: Dragonchick93 on August 24, 2005, 03:14:06 PM

Quote

Originally posted by Drace
When you are kissing a girl and her father comes. "What are you doing to my daughter?!" I'm kissing her, duh.

*sigh*
*blush*
thats why my dad makes me keep my door open when i have "guy"friends over.

Title:
Post by: Blademon on August 24, 2005, 04:47:03 PM

Lol Dragonium I agree with most of your gripes.

But some, It's not a big deal and are actually better that way.
Asking for the time for example, you're walking down the street thinking about what you need to buy for back to school when out of nowhere someone comes and says "What is the time"

You would be like wtf? See, poiting to the wrist makes you start THINKING about "I don't have a watch and I need to know what time it is, can you please help me?". It eliminates that 2-3 second daze where you didn't expect anyone to disturb you, which it's true, we accord a lot more importance to it than it really diserves.