Return of The Big Emerald

[WarxePB]

A classic Charas forum game, brought back from the grave once more!


The goal of the Big Emerald is to obtain the titular large gem from the poster who had it last. But how do you do that? Well, that's the fun part - let your imagination run wild!

There's two rules to the game:

-The Big Emerald cannot be damaged or destroyed.
-You have to be creative - you can't simply say "I steal it from this person", and you can't use the same tactic twice.

As for anything else? Everything goes. Posting tends toward RP-lite, but you can do it however you like. With that said, let's go!


***

*After a long journey to lands unknown, Warxe returns to the wonderful land of Charas.*

-Warxe: Ah, it's great to be back home. I think I'll go knock a few back at the Pub- *trips over something* What the hell?

*Warxe has tripped over something. Conveniently, it's the exposed Big Emerald! Its brilliant cut brings back memories... oh yes, all sorts of old, trauma-suppressed memories.*

-Warxe: God damnit, not this again. Well, I guess I'll wait until someone steals it from me. In the meantime... *magicks up two palm trees, a hammock and a pitcher of lemonade* ...might as well enjoy it.

[WarxePB]

Warxe: ....****.

*Warxe gets trampled by the mob, and the Emerald is lost in the confusion...*

[Emerates]

*As maddened Charasians carry Warxe away in an orgy of confusion, Emerates returns from lands... less known and further away.  As he scans the now empty street, a glint of lust-filled minty green catches his eye.*

Emerates: Gahh!!! Damn it!  *He rubs his eye as it begins to suppurate tears in a steady fountain.*  Honestly, who leaves something protru-  Ahh, what's this?

*The lust-filled minty green eye-catching device, upon a more distant inspection, reveals itself to be the coveted and accursed Big Emerald.*

Emerates:  This looks valuable... Perhaps I'll just.... *He pries it from the flimsy wooden wall, looks about, and stuffs it into his satchel.*  I'm so contented right now, I'm not even particularly interested as to why there's a giant precious stone lodged in the side of this building.  That sounds like a mystery to be solved by Future Poster.

[WarxePB]

*Warxe manages to escape from the orgy of violence, which has now become a regular old orgy.... ew.*

Warxe: God damnit, that sucks. Now, as for that Emerald... *catches up to Emerates*

Emerates: What's going on?

Warxe: Big Emerald game again. Mind giving it to me?

Emerates: No.

Warxe: But you're gonna lose it eventually. You might as well just hand it over without violence.

Emerates: I'll take my chances.

Warxe: Fine then. Hey Lucas!

Lucas: *comes over* What?

Warxe: Mind lendingMEAHAND! *picks up Lucas and savagely beats Emerates with him*

Emerates & Lucas: Owww...

Warxe: Yoink! *digs through Emerates' satchel and takes the Emerald* *walks away, then goes back and steals some more stuff from Emerates* Now then, I have an impractical flying castle to rebuild...

[Emerates]

Emerates: *Watching Warxe's departure through a veil of his own blood*  There will be blood... *He lies in the street for some time, before being ushered out of the gutter as the orgy begins to ebb back into the town which as yet has not been named.*

[WarxePB]

Warxe: Oh yeah, this town has a name. Well... let's name it Charastown for now. It's as big as the plot needs it to be, and it works on the principles of quantum generation - if you want it, it exists. For example, watch this!

*Grandy appears*

Grandy: What the hell? I haven't even posted in this thread!

Warxe: But by the laws of Charastown, if I want it, it exists! Besides, in this particular canon, my vague mystical powers include summoning things.

Grandy: Screw this. *walks off*

Warxe: He'll be back. In the meantime... *whistles a showtune as he skips away from the oncoming orgy*