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Romance Wars: The Eternal Savior Legend (Original Story)
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Topic: Romance Wars: The Eternal Savior Legend (Original Story) (Read 1847 times)
The Great Goddess Atma
Patron Deity of Otakus
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Posts: 66
Romance Wars: The Eternal Savior Legend (Original Story)
«
on:
October 01, 2004, 01:52:05 AM »
I've been working on this story for literally half my life now and only recently have I been able to put thoughts into words. All I have is the first chapter and the prologue, although other parts of the story are fleshed out and typed. I am working on chapter two right now and I'm kinda stuck so don't expect it anytime soon. Anyways, enjoy.
REN'AI NO SENTOU: EIEN WO KYUUSEISHA NO DENSETSU
(ROMANCE WARS: THE ETERNAL SAVIOR LEGEND)
PROLOGUE
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The universe was nothing but energy not long ago
The energy bubbled with red, green, and blue glows
It bubbled and mixed like this for millennia
Then one day, the energy stopped moving and became a gemstone
A beam of light shone form the gemstone on that fated day
'Twas a harsh light like that of the Summer sun
Soon, three goddesses were born to the universe
Green land, red life, and blue law emerged form them
The cold gales became a gentle breeze and the dry land became moist
Rigga, Djang, and Sara-Holy Creators of history, destiny, order and chaos-
Breathed life into the cosmos and led the people
These people lived peacefully by happiness and magics
They soon began praying to the three and worshipping them as gods
Then their was the one who left her mark in the people's souls
With her powers, she protected our happiness with her name known only to a few
Even on journeys of same paths people live out their days the best they can
And each new day a new legend is carved into the history if the universe
The story I will tell thee is one of these
Far away, thousands of years ago, only the Holy Creators and the Lost Battlefield
Are the ones that are allowed to know the truth
This all took place long, long ago on scarred, sacred, and ancient lands
This shaped the universe into what it is and shall be
It is the tale of an outcast deity....And the greatest tale to ever be told...
REN'AI NO SENTOU: EIEN WO KYUUSEISHA NO DENSETSU
(ROMANCE WARS: THE ETERNAL SAVIOR LEGEND)
FIRST CHAPTER
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There once stood a small village secluded form the modern world in a forest not too far form the main road. The tops of the pagodas stood nearly as tall as the trees and lived very close together. Dark, scratched paint covered them and turned darker when light shone on them. The grass and trees stood quietly, undisturbed by the human residents. Flowers grew about the ground and wild herbs and fruits filled the air with their scents. Fall had just dawned on the people as they began to prepare for their festivities. All seemed well and good with the world.
This is where our tale begins.
The sun rose early that Autumn morning, greeting the people of the nearby village through the window cracks. All whose eyes the glare met rose to complete the day. All except one person: The lazy grand-daughter of the shrine priest Katsura no Toku, Amanda. Always sleeping in late and goofing off, Amanda was constantly scolded by her strict elders. Their maid, Yappi, would always have to pour water on Amanda or yell at in her ears to get her to rise. But at least this week she had an excuse to be lazy, she was to turn 18 years of age and marry. So the lazy one figured to enjoy her last free days. It wasn't too much longer before Yappi came in with a teapot full of cold well water to dump on Amanda. She knocked on her door to try to wake her before resorting to the more unpleasant measure.
"Amanda! It's almost time for lunch! It's time you woke up! Don't make me soak your sheets again! You know how much it upsets me!" she said as she rapped the door's side. Now you see, Yappi was a kind woman, about 22 years in age and had short black hair and gray eyes to match. Her 7 different colored kimono sparkled every day now matter how bright or dark it was. Her voice was deep but full of feminine character. Her job was to care for Amanda and Katsura, which she had been doing for about 5 years.
Amanda yawned. "Oh it's you, Yappi. Come on in I've been up for a while now." she replied, sounding depressed.
"Well this is surprising! Up before lunch! That's a rarity!" Yappi replied as she sat down next to Amanda. "You seem upset. Care to talk about it?"
"Yappi, You have always been too kind to me, but I don't think you can help me in any way this time." said Amanda, twirling her dark brown hair.
"Oh just tell me anyways! You'd be surprised what I may be able to do!"
"I don't want to get married next week on my 18th birthday. I want to be free and happy like you. I don't want to spend my first night free and as a wife becoming pregnant with my first child! You are very lucky the fates decided something different for you."
"Don't say that! I know I myself have never had a husband or a child, but I yearn for that happiness every second that I breathe! You are very lucky to be getting a husband and father for your future children, especially one as handsome and strong as the one chosen for you!"
"Yappi, I don't want to live the life of a housewife! I want to travel the world! I want to seek my own path! I want to find my own love! I want to destroy beasts and eat rare foods!"
"Is that what you want? Do you remember the last time someone wished as you? They were exiled and found dead a week later nearby and half eaten by an ogre!"
"I know that! Everyone knows that! That happened only a few years ago! But I've been training all my life! I will be different!"
"I give up. Your stubbornness has always been a huge issue and it looks like it will win out again if I try to sway you to stay. You win. I'll even help you leave."
"You would do that for me? Oh thank you, Yappi! I am forever in your debt!"
Amanda ran off to eat happily. Freedom would soon belong to her, and she could barely contain her joy. She began to make a mental list of what she would need. She ate in mere minutes and ran off to conduct trade to rid herself of useless things. After lunch, she dressed quickly and ran off with a bag f junk. The first place she visited the scroll place where she traded in some poems for a journal.
"What's this about? You love poems. I would never dreamed YOU would be giving them up." the shop keeper asked.
"Nothing important. I'm just far too old now to be crying over a lost love I never even knew." Amanda replied.
She then traded in everything else in the bag for food, weapons, armor, and medicines. She went back to her house and hid her new things in a secret panel in the floor under her bed. A few nights passed and it was soon the eve before the escape. Amanda was awake almost the whole night, excited about her journey. Soon, Yappi came in and woke Amanda up for her "wedding" and birthday. The two quickly packed as many supplies as they could into a bag and hid it in a tree at the edge of town. With all things finally in place, Amanda went to her grandfather's room to say one last goodbye.
"Grandpa..." Amanda began. "I'm going out for a little while. I love you very much."
"Are you going out of the house before the wedding? That's bad luck you know." Katsura replied.
"I know, but I really need to let out some energy."
"Heh. You always were an excited little one, weren't you? Go on, come back soon."
"Grandpa.....I love you more than anyone else. You have taken care of me since birth with nobody to help you except for Yappi. I am truly grateful for your kindness and wish you only the best." Amanda barely muttered before she ran outside, bursting into tears. She took one last look behind her and made her way towards the tree at the edge of town.
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AsakuraHao2004
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«
Reply #1 on:
October 01, 2004, 02:05:33 AM »
NICE!! It seems to have a lot of Japanese elements. When I write a story or a manga, I can't seem to use anything exceot Japanese names, though. The only downside was that Yappi seemed to be a little too easy to convince. Also, the final sceen between her grandfather seemed to be forcing the emotion. Perhaps spacing memories of him thoughout the chapter instead of all at the end would have better achieved the desired emotion.
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AKA Desimodontidae. If you're seeing this profile, Im probably at school.
If i were a clown, would you hold me when I'm down?/I wish I had someone to make me drown/So many people don't know that it's so damn hard to be a clown/I am the clown with the giant frown/My heart is in a state of being upside down...
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Romance Wars: The Eternal Savior Legend (Original Story)