Oddities of Life-RP

[Big_Duke]

*a man with blonde hair and sunglasses in a hawaiian shirt and khaki pants, is lying on the porch with a drink of unknown type*
Man on porch:Summer Vacation, the best time to relax and take like a chill pill or sumthin', whatever,*Chugs drink* ahhhh, make all the lame stuff I want, nobody cares, bit boring though. Meh.*Goes to refill his drink* I really gotta stop talkin' to myself.


(Note:weapons have unlimited ammo)

[darkrune]

*Dwer Sat In The Car As They drove down the ugly littred, streets.*

Dwer: Driver, hurry up I don't have all day.

If the truth be told Dwer was nervous, he was making a drop to a new client, and the client was a bit shady, more  than Dwer was at least, Dwer didn't want to get busted, or extorted by the pigs.

Dwer: Meh, buisness is tough.

[Fang_of_blades]

*Jack Spade also known as "21" sits back in his chair lightly so that it's only on it's back 2 legs as he looks up at the dart board in the small dark tavern as he shuffles his deck of playing cards in his hands. as he sets the deck down on the table in front of himself next to his glock 9mm he picks up the top card of the deck and lays it onto the table and then picks up his gun and points it towards the dart board looking to the bar tender in the room "think i can hit 10 point on black bar keep? $20 dollars says i make it" *smirks as he says it as the bar keep shrugs and then turns away, as the bar keep says that Jack looks down and puts his gun back into the holster at his side "this joints rather dead... i need someone that acctualy would place a bet..."

[Big_Duke]

Sigurd is driving

Sigurd: *Something hits nad sounds like breaking the back windshield of the car he's in, he looks back to see the windsheild smashed, looks back to the road, then back to the Windshield which is now fine* What the?! *Pulls car over to look at the back of the car which is broken* Crap!!!! Crap, crap, crap, crap.

Sigurd walks to work, being like 1/2 an hour late

Sigurd: *Near the entrance* Crap, what a day. *The floor he's standing on opens, and he slides down a tube to an office* Hey, what's the big idea?

Man: Hello, Sigurd.

Sigurd: How did you know my name?!

Man: I know quite alot about you, Mr. Hunas.

Sigurd: Van Hunas please.

Man: Okay Van Hunas, it appears that you have had an odd experience this morning, what has happened?

Sigurd: Well, first I heard glass break in my car, then I looked back to see the glass broken, looked back to the road, and looked agian at the bakc which was fixed, I pulled over got out and the back of my car was entirely broken, so I walked to work, and now I'm here.

Man: We, the Men and Women's Organization of World Protection or, M.W.O.W.P. started that, but, for your protection. *Pushes buttons on console, revealing a big T.V. that shows blood splattered walls and bodies everywhere*

Sigurd: Holy, freaking, crap!

[Fang_of_blades]

(*back to Jack Spade*)

*Jack puts his chair back onto all four legs and begins to stand up slowly and stretching lightly* "maybe a stroll might help..." *Jack looks to the bartender again for a momment before heading towards the door, as he exits the bar he is in a back alleyway and pulls a half full bottle of whiskey out from his jacket and smirks* "only thing better than free is scotch free." *begins to chuckle at his own joke and takes a swig as he begins to walk slowly down the alleyway*

[darkrune]

The drop went fine. The dealer client was open to Dwer's deal, and Dwer had landed another large drug deal with a high powered man in the underworld. Dwer had to make sure he didn't make to much heat, the last thing he wanted was M.W.O.W.P on his back to make troubles for him.

Dwer: Head back to HQ, I will bring Barley and Menace with me to the Extort downtown.

The driver navigated left to Dwer's estate, which he recently bought will all illegal currency.

Dwer: Home sweet home.

[Big_Duke]

*The T.V. turns off and rises back into the ceiling*

Man: That, was a hallway in your work, if we hadn't interfered you would've been killed at that moment.

Sigurd: hhhmmmm, risks and danger, sounds like my kind of work, I need a job, how much does this pay?

Man: Eighty dollars a day.

Sigurd: I'm in!

Man: First you must pass 3 tests, strength, courage, and intellegance.

Sigurd: I don't know about the last one.

Man:*Snickers* You work at a place that designs computers! How could you not be witty.

Sigurd: I was kidding. But, um, sir, what's your name?

Man: Bartholomew.

Sigurd: Yes, well let's get started.

[darkrune]

All  was well in the life of Dwer, in the darkness of the night the light shined down on red blood on the floor of the home, the man had crossed Dwer for the last time, he had dared to withhold money from Dwer..

Menace(Dwer's Soilder): Sir..We killed him in cold blood..

Dwer: Yes, we did, a problem?

Menace: Um, no sir..

Dwer knew that Menace disapproved of it but if he left someone to be that crossed him, how would that help him, or his reputation in the land of scum and greed.

Dwer: Someday, maybe we will be rich enough to where we don't have to do this, until then, you will kill, understand?

Menace: Yes sir.

[Big_Duke]

The first test.....

Bart: Now Sigurd, to pass this test you must over come this thing

*Shows a hologram of a minotaur*

Sigurd: Fine, let's do it.

Little later.......

*Sigurd is in the arena with his zweiwielder, the minotaur appears*

Sigurd: Okay, no problem, just a 7 foot hairy guy with big muscles and bad breath, I can take it. *Charges the minotaur, but is knock back*

Sigurd: Ow, okay gotta find a different way, *examine minotaur, and finds a way to defeat it* Ah ha!

Minotaur: *Roars*

Sigurd: *Runs at the monster and jumps on it's back and stabs it's heart from the back, then he jumps back down as the minotaur collapses*

[Fang_of_blades]

*as Jack walks to the street he sees a car with an open window and smirks as he opens the car door looking around to see if anyones watching him and then sits inside of it and then looks above the visor for the keys and grins as he finds the keys. starting the car up and driving off a guy comes out of another near by alley  and yells after jack "hey Thats My Car!"*

[Big_Duke]

Bart: Now the second test, courage. Now you have to face your worst nightmare, Chuck Norris.

Sigurd: NOOO!

Bart: I'm just kidding, you have to face a Bloggart in the form of your worst nightmare.

Sigurd: Thank god, wait, NOOOOOO!!!!!

Bart: Not Chuck Norris.

Sigurd: Oh, then it'd be my mom as a trigger happy maniaccovered with blood and very muscular with long toenails, who people call "George".

Bart: Okay.

*Sigurd is lowered to the arena, where he sees "George" andstays still while "george" comes closer until it's staring Sigurd close in the face*

Sigurd: Ow. Your toenails are digging into my skin.

*"George" deteriorates*

Bart: Good job, why didn't you panic?

Sigurd: What was there to fear?

Bart: "George".

Sigurd: Who's George?

Bart: Your worst nightmare.

Sigurd: That wasn't my mom.

Bart: Oh.

Sigurd: That was my aunt.

Bart: Ah.

[Fang_of_blades]

*while driveing the car, a few blocks away from an abandoned apartment building the car stalls as the gas tank is empty*... you piece of crap! *Jack hits the dash board and then gets out of the car and looks to the apartment building but then looks around before walking into it. once inside finds a room with some furniture covered in white sheets and sits down in a chair not removeing the sheet* i'll crash for a bit before hiting the streets, making some cash... *begins to doze off slightly*

[Big_Duke]

Post?

[Darkfox]

I believe it has died. Like the last hmmm... 20 or so, no offence but I think you really wore it out.

[Big_Duke]

Sorry.