Bluhman's guide to Cliches

[Bluhman]

Basically, after taking a good look at the grand list of console rpg cliches (at http://project-apollo.net/text/rpg.html), I decided that I'd try and guide people on what cliches can be avoided, should be avoided, shouldn't and can't be avoided. Please note that simply defying these cliche's will not make an instantly great game. A game needs graphics, sound, and, most importantly, a good story.

Now to quote the good old Italian plumber, "Let's a-go!"

Sleepyhead Rule
The teenaged male lead will begin the first day of the game by oversleeping, being woken up by his mother, and being reminded that he's slept in so late he missed meeting his girlfriend.

Avoidable?: Yes.
Reccomended avoidance: Yes. What it adds to the game is kind of rough...

"No! My beloved peasant village!"
The hero's home town, city, slum, or planet will usually be annihilated in a spectacular fashion before the end of the game, and often before the end of the opening scene.

Avoidable?: Yes.
Recommend?: Yes, but sometimes it's just neccesary. Sometimes cliches are unavoidable in a story, so don't try and dodge them if you're cornered by them.

Thinking With The Wrong Head (Hiro Rule)
No matter what she's accused of doing or how mysterious her origins are, the hero will always be ready to fight to the death for any girl he met three seconds ago.

Avoidable:Yes
Recommend: VERY YES. ARGH. This would be cliche palace. Don't ever do this unless cornered plot-wise (If you're cornered plotwise by this cliche', then I don't even want to know what the rest of your story is.)

Cubic Zirconium Corollary
The aforementioned mysterious girl will be wearing a pendant that will ultimately prove to be the key to either saving the world or destroying it.

Avoidable: Yes yet again.
Recommend: Maybe... If you can add a special twist to the gimmick, then that would be nice.

Logan's Run Rule
RPG characters are young. Very young. The average age seems to be 15, unless the character is a decorated and battle-hardened soldier, in which case he might even be as old as 18. Such teenagers often have skills with multiple weapons and magic, years of experience, and never ever worry about their parents telling them to come home from adventuring before bedtime. By contrast, characters more than twenty-two years old will cheerfully refer to themselves as washed-up old fogies and be eager to make room for the younger generation.

Avoidable: Yes. Very yes.
Reccomend: Yes. Really, when you think about it, a Teen in an RPG seems to act like someone of grown up-ness. Therefore, I'd recommend you age your main character anywhere from 20-40.

Single Parent Rule
RPG characters with two living parents are almost unheard of. As a general rule, male characters will only have a mother, and female characters will only have a father. The missing parent either vanished mysteriously and traumatically several years ago or is never referred to at all. Frequently the main character's surviving parent will also meet an awkward end just after the story begins, thus freeing him of inconvenient filial obligations.

Avoidable:Yes
Recommend: Yes. It's not that hard to make a story that doesn't involve the death of your parent.

Some Call Me... Tim?
Good guys will only have first names, and bad guys will only have last names. Any bad guy who only has a first name will become a good guy at some point in the game. Good guys' last names may be mentioned in the manual but they will never be referred to in the story.

Avoidable:Yes
Recommend: Yes. It's not that hard really, just make sure to mention the full name at some point.

Nominal Rule
Any character who actually has a name is important in some way and must be sought out. However, if you are referred to as a part of a posessive noun ("Crono's Mom") then you are superfluous.

Avoidable: Yes
Reccomend: Yes. It's nice to see some NPC's with a bit more detail!

The Compulsories
There's always a fire dungeon, an ice dungeon, a sewer maze, a misty forest, a derelict ghost ship, a mine, a glowing crystal maze, an ancient temple full of traps, a magic floating castle, and a technological dungeon.

Avoidable: No. I'm sorry, but if you were to somehow dodge this, then you obviously are insane. See, an RPG NEEDS this stuff to go on and be good! It's things like this that would make the game just fall short if they weren't included.

Luddite Rule (or, George Lucas Rule)
Speaking of which, technology is inherently evil and is the exclusive province of the Bad Guys. They're the ones with the robots, factories, cyberpunk megalopolises and floating battle stations, while the Good Guys live in small villages in peaceful harmony with nature. (Although somehow your guns and/or heavily armed airships are exempted from this.)

Avoidable: Yes.
Reccomend: Yes. Any way possible. It isn't even that logical to have the two mixed together. Try and keep it a constant theme, you'll find your game more believable.

Let's Start From The Very Beginning (Yuna Rule)
Whenever there is a sequel to an RPG that features the same main character as the previous game, that character will always start with beginner skills. Everything that they learned in the previous game will be gone, as will all their ultra-powerful weapons and equipment.

Avoidable: No. You'd need a heck of a lot of coding to make the game recognise data from another!

Poor Little Rich Hero (Meis Rule)
If the hero comes from a rich and powerful family, it will have fallen on hard times and be broke and destitute by the time the game actually starts.

Avoidable: Yes
Reccomend: Yes. Again, another simple plot kink.

The Higher The Hair, The Closer To God (Cloud Rule)
The more outrageous his hairstyle, the more important a male character is to the story.

Avoidable: Yes
Reccomend: ... ... Maybe... Sometimes if your character was to have a normal hairstyle and all the people around him had flattops, afros, and cloud-strife hairdews, then your character could feel a bit insegnificant. Of course, normal hair adds realism. Try and keep them hairs down.

Garrett's Principle
Let's not mince words: you're a thief. You can walk into just about anybody's house like the door wasn't even locked. You just barge right in and start looking for stuff. Anything you can find that's not nailed down is yours to keep. You will often walk into perfect strangers' houses, lift their precious artifacts, and then chat with them like you were old neighbors as you head back out with their family heirlooms under your arm. Unfortunately, this never works in stores.

Avoidable: Yes
Reccomend: Unless you're an excellent programmer, then I'd say no. Otherwise, this Cliche can be meshed into a nice game feature!

You will accumulate at least three of these obligatory party members:
The spunky princess who is rebelling against her royal parent and is in love with the hero.
The demure, soft-spoken female mage and healing magic specialist who is not only in love with the hero, but is also the last survivor of an ancient race.
The tough-as-nails female warrior who is not in love with the hero (note that this is the only female character in the game who is not in love with the hero and will therefore be indicated as such by having a spectacular scar, a missing eye, cyborg limbs or some other physical deformity -- see The Good, The Bad, And The Ugly Rule.)
The achingly beautiful gothy swordsman who is riven by inner tragedy.
The big, tough, angry guy who, deep down, is a total softy.
The hero's best friend, who is actually much cooler than the hero.
The grim, selfish mercenary who over the course of the game learns what it means to really care about other people.
The character who is actually a spy for the bad guys but will instantly switch to your side when you find out about it.
The weird bonus character who requires a bizarre series of side quests to make them effective (with the ultimate result that no player ever uses this character if it can be avoided.)
The nauseatingly cute mascot who is useless in all battles.

Avoidable: Yes
Recommended: Maybe. Try and mix these character ideas up... It could end up with some weird ideas that just might work!

Hey, I Know You, Too!
You will also confront/be confronted by at least three of these obligatory antagonists:
The amazingly good-looking and amazingly evil long-haired prettyboy who may or may not be the ultimate villain.
The villain's loyal right-hand man, who comes in two versions: humorously incompetent or annoyingly persistent.
The villain's attractive female henchman, who is the strongest and most competent soldier in the army but always lets the party escape because she's, yes, fallen in love with the hero.
Your former ally who supposedly "died" and was forgotten about, until much later in the game when he/she shows up again on the villain's side and full of bitterness.
The irritatingly honorable foe whom you never get to kill because, upon discovering the true nature of his superiors, he either nobly sacrifices himself or joins your party.
The insane clown or jester who will turn out to be surprisingly difficult to subdue.
The mad scientist who likes creating mutated creatures and powerful weapons 'cause it's fun (and also handy if uninvited adventurers show up.)
The adorably cute li'l creature or six year old child who fights you and, inexplicably, kicks your butt time after time.

Avoidable/Reccomend: Look up.

Hey, I Know You, Three!
Furthermore, expect to encounter most of the following obligatory non-player chararcters (NPCs):
The townsperson or crewmember who wanders aimlessly in circles and never quite gets where he is going.
Hilariously incompetent or cowardly soldiers.
The NPC who has a crush on another NPC and can't quite work up the nerve to tell him or her, so instead tells every other person who wanders by about it at great length.
A group of small children playing hide-and-seek.
The wise and noble captain/king/high priest.
The wise and noble captain/king/high priest's splutteringly evil second-in-command. Nobody, including the hero, will notice the second's constant, crazed scheming until the moment when he betrays everyone to the forces of badness.
The NPC who is obsessed with his completely mundane job and witters on endlessly about how great it is. He's so thrilled by it that he wants to share it with everyone he sees, so given a quarter of a chance he'll make you do his job for him.
The (adult) NPC who has nothing better to do than play kids' games with passersby.
The group of young women who have formed a scarily obsessive fan club for one of your female party members.

Avoidable: Yes
Recommend: Yes. Remember to try and add some detail into your NPCs.

Crono's Complaint
The less the main character talks, the more words are put into his mouth, and therefore the more trouble he gets into through no fault of his own.

Avoidable: Yes
Recommend: Sure. It could be a bit interesting to use this one, but really, having the main character at least respond with single words adds a bit of personality.

"Silly Squall, bringing a sword to a gunfight..."
No matter what timeframe the game is set in -- past, present, or future -- the main hero and his antagonist will both use a sword for a weapon. (Therefore, you can identify your antagonist pretty easily right from the start of the game just by looking for the other guy who uses a sword.) These swords will be far more powerful than any gun and often capable of distance attacks.

Avoidable: Yes
Reccomend: KIND of... Your main character should use a sword, but it should be a different type of sword. One of my characters used a sword that looked more like a meat-cleaver. Anywho... You SHOULD NOT have them be more powerful than any weapon in the game. They're just swords! Furthermore, why would swords mix with guns?

Just Nod Your Head And Smile
And no matter how big that big-*** sword is, you won't stand out in a crowd. Nobody ever crosses the street to avoid you or seems to be especially shocked or alarmed when a heavily armed gang bursts into their house during dinner, rummages through their posessions, and demands to know if they've seen a black-caped man. People can get used to anything, apparently.
Avoidable: Yes.
Reccomend: Sure! It'd be interesting for someone to come up to you and say "That is the largest butter knife I've seen in a while.".

That was stupid.

Aeris's Corollary
Just as the main male character will always use a sword or a variant of a sword, the main female character will always use a rod or a staff of some sort.

Avoidable: Yes
Reccomend: Yes. Really, my secondary female character uses katars. There's just so much variation from just a staff.

MacGyver Rule
Other than for the protagonists, your choice of weapons is not limited to the prosaic guns, clubs, or swords. Given appropriate skills, you can cut a bloody swath across the continent using gloves, combs, umbrellas, megaphones, dictionaries, sketching tablets -- you name it, you can kill with it. Even better, no matter how surreal your choice of armament, every store you pass will just happen to stock an even better model of it for a very reasonable price. Who else is running around the world killing people with an umbrella?

Avoidable: Yes
Recommend: Not really. It's weaponry like that that is just so much more eye-catching from a sword or gun. Each and every one of the characters should stand out from one another, and one thing that helps are unique weapons.

O Brother, Where Art Thou? (Melfice Rule)
If the male hero has an older sibling, the sibling will also be male and will turn out to be one of the major villains. If the hero has a younger sibling, the sibling will be female and will be kidnapped and held hostage by the villains.

Avoidable: Yes
Reccommend: Yes

I'm not going to explain. I'm just going to say that siblings are lame.

Capitalism Is A Harsh Mistress
Once you sell something to a shopkeeper, he instantly sells it to somebody else and you will never see the item again no matter what.

Avoidable: No. You'd need a custom shop system to make something like that work, and that would take a while to program for every single town.

Dimensional Transcendence Principle
Buildings are much, much larger on the inside than on the outside, and that doesn't even count the secret maze of tunnels behind the clock in the basement.

Avoidable: Yes
Reccommend: No. It's difficult to put details into tiny houses. For example, a three tile house from outside would be three tiles inside. Now seriously, that would be enough room for a bed and a stove. As you can see, this one is just bad to avoid (except for the secret passage part... ugh)

Tune in tommorrow for numbers 26-50!

[Darkfox]

I got a few.

I befriend no beast!
Basically, anything not human is an enemy, no questions asked, even if they be sentient or not.

"Live long and prosper."
One of the main characters or more are elves.

Humans numbah one, baby!
Related to top one. All party members are human despite the fact that other species are very capable of doing so.

Avoidable: Yes
Reccomended Avoidance: Definetly, if your going to have a fantasy world filled with sentient lifeforms then you best have some as heroes, heck, try giving one the main char slot... as long as he (or she) isn't somthing dumb (like a goblin XD).

I have blue hair, guess I'm alien.
This is a rather silly cliche, somtimes another race will look EXACTLY human but have some silly skin color or hair color that is supposed to set them apart. SARCASTIC WOW!

Avoidable: Yes
Reccomended  Avoidance: Definetly, this plagues some animes as well as games and can be quite monotinous, another variable of this silly cliche is winged people, you see it a tad too often, they myswell be called winged humans (Example: Breath of Fire series) cause thats what they basicly are -_-'

Additional:

It just won't budge...
You can kill an ogre in one blow of your fist, but when a little boulder falls in your path you can't get by, what is it made of, lead?

Avoidable: Yes
Reccomended Avoidance: YES!! Especially when there are multiple characters, make it somthing that can't be pushed or broken through if your going to block a player off.

[CoolZidane]

Broken Bridge
If there's ever a bridge that is broken, there is always a one-tile gap between the two halves of the bridge. The heroes are incapable of jumping this distance, even though they recently leapt 10 feet into the air to grab onto ledges just to get there.

Avoidable: Yes
Recommended: Definitely! All you have to do is make the gap larger. Don't make it too big, but make it reasonably spaced.


Forgive me, O Lord.....Psyche!
Villains never seek repentance unless they are:
a. Not the main villain
b. About to die
c. Not really seeking repentance

Avoidable: Yes.
Recommended: Not really. It would be interesting to see the villain feel sorry for what he's done, but it's even more interesting to have the villain feel no regret at all. It makes him more evil.


Are You Heroes? If So, Get in Jail!
Everything that goes wrong in the world is the fault of the heroes. At least, it is through the eyes of royalty. Therefore, the heroes are put in jail with little to no proof of their wrongdoings.

Avoidable: Yes
Recommended: Yes. Give your royalty some common sense.


Bet You Can't Beat Me
When you are nearing the final dungeon, you can often find at least one cheap-*** (with a great item) who wants to test your strength, despite the fact that the heroes have already wiped out 95% of the monster population.

Avoidable: Yes
Recommended: Hell yes. This cliche really bugs me. Why does he want to test your strength? Didn't he notice that you defeated most of the villain's underlings, most of the monsters of the world, and saved towns from certain destruction? If you're going to make an optional boss, make sure there is a good reason.

[coasterkrazy]

Return with greater strength
Very often the hero's party will fight someone or something that they can't hurt, and they will undoubtedly die. Then later on in the game, they meet again, but this time you can win for some reason never given.

Avoidable: Yes
Reccomended: Yes. Maybe make a reason why they can't beat him at first, but they can later. Maybe the heroes receive some item or something that helps. One thing about Tales of Symphonia that bugged me - "Oh no Yggdrasill is too strong!" Then later on the game, "We're gonna beat you this time!" And then you're allowed to beat him.


Chests, chests, everywhere!
Chests will be everywhere. In houses, in dungeons, etc. And these chests will always have useful items or traps in them.

Avoidable: Yes
Reccomended: Maybe. Games do need chests, but sometimes you might wonder why there are so many chests just sitting around in some forest. Instead of making a chest, make a tile that stands out, maybe by making it sparkling or something. Chests would be in houses, but as mentioned before, would the rightful owners just let you take what's in it?

[Bluhman]

Local Control Rule
Although the boss monster terrorizing the first city in the game is less powerful than the non-boss monsters that are only casual nuisances to cities later in the game, nobody from the first city ever thinks of hiring a few mercenaries from the later cities to kill the monster.

Avoidable: Yes
Reccomend: Yes. It would be interesting to have other people than you trying to stop monsters like that.

Nostradamus Rule
All legends are 100% accurate. All rumors are entirely factual. All prophecies will come true, and not just someday but almost immediately.

Avoidable: Yes
Reccommend: Yes. Try mixing this concept up; legends that are factual, rumors that are somewhat accurate, a false prophecy, or a true one that will come forth only after something big happens.

IDKFA
The basic ammunition for any firearms your characters have is either unlimited or very, very easy to obtain. This will apply even if firearms are extremely rare.

Avoidable: No. You'd need to program something to count every single bullet used... That would be painful.

Indestructible Weapon Rule
No matter how many times you use that sword to strike armored targets or fire that gun on full auto mode it will never break, jam or need any form of maintenance unless it is critical to the story that the weapon breaks, jams or needs maintenance.

Avoidable: No. You'd need a custom battle system or something to stop this from happening.

Selective Paralysis
Your characters must always keep both feet on the ground and will be unable to climb over low rock ledges, railings, chairs, cats, slightly differently-colored ground, or any other trivial objects which may happen to be in their way. Note that this condition will not prevent your characters from jumping from railroad car to railroad car later in the game.

Avoidable: Yes
Reccommend: Yes. Just program special points where the hero can jump over things. Better yet, make a special common event that allows the hero to jump at any time in the game.

Bed Bed Bed
A good night's sleep will cure all wounds, diseases, and disabilities, up to and including death in battle.

Avoidable: No. You'd need a special inn system. Even then, this is just something essential to RPGs.

You Can't Kill Me, I Quit (Seifer Rule)
The good guys never seem to get the hang of actually arresting or killing the bad guys. Minor villains are always permitted to go free so they can rest up and menace you again later -- sometimes five minutes later. Knowing this rule, you can deduce that if you do manage to kill (or force the surrender of) a bad guy, you must be getting near the end of the game.

Avoidable: Yes
Reccomend: Yes. Just make them die earlier on.

And Now You Die, Mr. Bond! (Beatrix Rule)
Fortunately for you, the previous rule also applies in reverse. Rather than kill you when they have you at their mercy, the villains will settle for merely blasting you down to 1 hit point and leaving you in a crumpled heap while they stroll off, laughing. (This is, of course, because they're already planning ahead how they'll manipulate you into doing their bidding later in the game -- see Way To Go, Serge.)

Avoidable: Yes
Reccomend: Not really. If your game was just plain cruel, then I guess this could work.

Zap!
Most villains in RPGs possess some form of teleportation. They generally use it to materialize in front of the adventurers when they reach the Obligatory Legendary Relic Room and seize the goodies just before you can. The question "if the bad guy can teleport anywhere at any time, then why doesn't (s)he just zip in, grab the artifact, and leave before the adventurers have even finished the nerve-wracking puzzle on the third floor?" is never answered.

Avoidable: Yes
Reccomend: Not really. If your game was just plain cruel, then I guess this could work.

Heads I Win, Tails You Lose (Grahf Rule)
It doesn't matter that you won the fight with the boss monster; the evil task he was trying to carry out will still get accomplished somehow. Really, you might as well not have bothered.

Avoidable: Yes
Reccommend: Yes, just don't make it the boss' fault that what he was to do was done.

Clockwork Universe Rule
No matter how hard you try to stop it, that comet or meteor will always hit the earth.

Avoidable: Yes
Reccommend: Yes. I'm a bit confused why you'd make a comet or meteor hit earth, other than a powerful attack spell.

Fake Ending
There will be a sequence which pretends to be the end of the game but obviously isn't -- if for no other reason than because you're still on Disk 1 of 4.

Avoidable: Yes
Reccommend: Depends. This cliche can actually be niceley used with the RM2K system, as it doesn't use disks.

You Die, And We All Move Up In Rank
During that fake ending, the true villain of the story will kill the guy you'd thought was the villain, just to demonstrate what a badass he (the true villain) really is. You never get to kill the fake villain yourself.

Avoidable: Yes
Reccommend: Yes. The fake villan could be killed by the heroes or The fake villan could survive.

"What are we going to do tonight, Vinsfeld?"
The goal of every game (as revealed during the Fake Ending) is to Save the World from an evil figure who's trying to take it over or destroy it. There is no way to escape from this formidable task. No matter whether the protagonist's goal in life is to pay off a debt, to explore distant lands, or just to make time with that cute girl in the blue dress, it will be necessary for him to Save the World in order to accomplish it. Take heart, though -- once the world gets sorted out, everything else will fall into place almost immediately.

Avoidable: Yes
Reccommend: Maybe, but this one will sometimes be undogdeable.

Zelda's Axiom
Whenever somebody tells you about "the five ancient talismans" or "the nine legendary crystals" or whatever, you can be quite confident that Saving the World will require you to go out and find every last one of them.

Avoidable: Yes
Reccommend: Yes. This is just an easily dodged stereotype in every video game.

George W. Bush Geography Simplification Initiative
Every country in the world will have exactly one town in it, except for the country you start out in, which will have three.

Avoidable: Yes
Reccommend: Yes. Just put more detail into the world map!

Fodor's Guide Rule
In the course of your adventure you will visit one desert city, one port town, one mining town, one casino city, one magic city (usually flying), one medieval castle kingdom, one clockwork city, one martial arts-based community, one thieves' slum, one lost city and one sci-fi utopia. On the way you'll also get a chance to see the cave with rocks that glow from a natural energy source, the village populated with nonhuman characters, the peaceful village where everyone knows the latest news about the hero's quest (see Guy in the Street Rule), the snow village, the magical forest/lake/mountain, the shop in the middle of nowhere, the fantastic-looking place with lots of FMVs just showing your entrance, the subtropical jungle island populated by friendly natives, the annoying cavern maze, and a place -- any place -- that was destroyed in some past disaster.

Avoidable: No, but it is possible to mix these concepts.

Midgar Principle
The capital of the evil empire is always divided into two sections: a lower city slum filled with slaves and supporters of the rebellion, and an upper city filled with loyal fanatics and corrupt aristocrats.

Avoidable: Yes
Reccommend: Yes. Try mixing the population in such a city up.

Not Invented Here
Trade of technology will not exist. One place in the world will have all the techno-gadgets while all the others will be harvesting dirt.

Avoidable: Yes
Reccommend: Yes. Seriously, try and keep your RPG completley futuristic, or completley historical!!!

Law of Cartographical Elegance
The world map always cleanly fits into a rectangular shape with no land masses that cross an edge.

Avoidable: No. All maps in RM2k are distinctly square/rectangular shaped.

¿Quien Es Mas Macho? (Fargo Rule)
Every powerful character you attempt to seek aid from will first insist upon "testing your strength" in a battle to the death.

Avoidable: Yes
Reccommend: Yes. This one is just lame.

We Had To Destroy The Village In Order To, Well, You Know The Rest (Selene Rule)
No matter what happens, never call on the government, the church, or any other massive controlling authority for help. They'll just send a brigade of soldiers to burn your entire village to the ground.

Avoidable: Yes
Reccommend: Yes. As CoolZidane said, try and give your nobles some common sense!

Zidane's Curse (or, Dirty Pair Rule)
An unlucky condition in which every major city in the game will coincidentally wind up being destroyed just after the hero arrives.

Avoidable: Yes
Reccommend: Yes. Try and make only SOME of these get destroyed, or at least try and vary the reason why the city falls apart.

Maginot Line Rule
It is easy to tell which city/nation is the next conquest of the Evil Empire: its streets are filled with citizens who brag that the Empire would never dare attack them, and would be easily defeated if it tried. (This smug nationalism always fails to take into account the Empire's new superweapon.)

Avoidable: No. Unlike some other cliches, this one makes a bit of sense.

Short Attention Span Principle
All bookshelves contain exactly one book, which only has enough text on it to fill up half a page.

Avoidable: No. Really, who would want to sit through 200 text boxes of writing in a book!?

Tune in later tonight for numbers 51-75!

[Cerebus]

Were items are put?
The hero have no bag, or if he does, it is a small one, but he can transport a hundred of weapons or items.

Avoidable : I don't think so...Maybe with a common event, but I doubt it.

This isn't normal.
Heores never need to eat, drink or go to the toilet. In some game, you can eat food to replenish health, but it is not necessary. Plus, they can sleep anytime during the day.

Avoidable : Maybe with a common event, but I'm not sure...

[CoolZidane]

The Whole Freakin' System's Out of Order!
A fair trial is never fair. Something will happen (suprise witness; villain does something), and the hero (or whichever member of the party is on trial) will be found guilty.

Avoidable: Yes
Recommended: Depends. It all really comes down to how much of a change in the story there would be if the hero were innocent.


The Freakin' System Corallory
However, if the villain is on trial, he's always found innocent.

Avoidable: Yes
Recommended: Yes. Throw his evil *** in jail for once. However, if you do make him innocent, make sure there is some importance to it (i.e. villain working his charms)


No Thanks, I'm Fine (but could you get my arm while you're over there?)
If there is ever a disaster that occurs in a crowded area (town, castle) and various bodies litter the scene, the survivors will never beg for help, but will instead go into great detail as to what happened.

Avoidable: Yes
Recommended: Yes. Have the people begging for help, and the hero unable to do anything. It adds a whole new level of darkness to the scene if people are lying on the ground, almost dead, begging for help.


Escher Mines
Mines always have bizzare systems of tracks in which you must ride a cart through to complete.

Avoidable: Yes
Recommended: Yes and no. You don't need to get rid of the cart riding part, but at least have the tracks look like they were built by someone with sense.

[Grandy]

 How The Hell You Got Here?
 Never shows how, but the last boss (or any boss) aways find a way to climb the mountain / go to the castle / run to the exit faster than you. In dungeons with 30 min/more time you need to walk, they can go thru in 5 sec.
 Avoidable: Yes.
 Recommended: Yes. You can show that the villain actually HAS a blimp or something like that to get in the top of the mountain faster.

[Bluhman]

Planet of the Apes Rule
All cities and countries have ancestors that were wiped out by their technological advances.

Avoidable: Yes
Reccommend: Yes. But if you are to use this one, please try and ELABORATE on how they died...

Insomnia Rule
A "free stay at the inn" is never really free. Expect to be woken up in the middle of the night for a mandatory plot event.

Avoidable: Yes
Reccommend: Yes. By the time this happens, your player should have some money. Just make it so that the character pays.

The Bling-Bling Thing (Lemina Rule)
No matter how much money and treasure you acquire, the greedy member of your party will never be satisfied and won't stop griping about the sorry state of the party's finances.

Avoidable: Yes
Reccommend: Yes. Either don't make that character, or make a gold-checking variable to see wether the finances satisfy the character.

I Don't Like Gears Or Fighting
There are always giant robots. Always.

Avoidable: Yes
Reccommend: Sometimes. Something like this is OK in a setting in the future, but not ALWAYS. A game with a historical setting is not going to have robots.

Houdini's Postulate
Anyone, whether they are in the player's party or not, who is placed in any kind of prison, fortress, cell, or detention block will escape immediately. Party members will be freed either by a small child they just happened to befriend earlier in the day or by an unexpected disaster that overcomes the enemy base, NPCs will be freed by the released party members, and villains will break out all by themselves because they're such badasses. Once a person has escaped from jail, no attempt will be made by the police to recapture them in the future.

Avoidable: Yes
Reccommend: Yes. It would be interesting to have the guards at least care you got away. Whatsmore, you should make a sort of time limit.

Zeigfried's Contradiction
Just because someone is weird doesn't mean they're important.

Avoidable: No... Unless you don't have weird people, but really, what game doesn't?

Natural Monopoly Rule
No city will have more than two shops, unless it is crucial to the story that there be a hundred vendors which you must visit in order (see You Always Travel In The Right Circles.) All of these shops will sell the same goods for the same price.

Avoidable: Yes
Reccommend: Yes. Try and make shops devoted to more specific things. Whatsmore, try and have certain towns only have certain services.

But They Don't Take American Express
Every merchant in the world -- even those living in far-off villages or hidden floating cities cut off from the outside world for centuries, even those who speak different languages or are of an entirely different species -- accepts the same currency.

Avoidable: No. You'd need many many variables and a custom menu system.

Apathy Principle
Your group is the only bunch of people trying to save the world. All other would-be heroes will either join your party or else turn out to be cowards and/or con men.

Avoidable: Yes
Reccommend: Look at what I said about Local Control Rule.
The Good, The Bad, And The Ugly Rule
a. Any male character who is ugly, malformed, or misshapen is either evil or so moral, spiritual, and/or wise that it's a wonder no one's proposed him for sainthood yet.
b. Any male character who has a physical disfiguration that doesn't seem to impede him (i.e. a prominent scar across the face or a bad eye) is evil, unless he is the male lead, since scars are cool and no other good guy can be as cool as the hero. An exception is made for characters who are clearly ancient, and therefore automatically not as cool as the young hero.
c. Any female character who is ugly, malformed, mishapen, or physically disfigured is evil, since all good female characters are there to be potentially seduced by the male lead -- see Know Your Audience.

Avoidable: Yes
Reccommend: ...Nah... Who really would wan't a hero that's 80 years old with his love sights on an ogre lady? Really, it's just not the same without a cast that one can like.

Henchman Quota (Nana, Saki, and Mio Rule)
One of your antagonists will have three lovably incompetent stooges whom you fight over and over again. Although they're trusted with their boss's most important plans and equipment, they will screw up repeatedly, argue incessantly among themselves, blab secret information, and generally only come out victorious when their job was to be a diversion or a delaying tactic. A high point of the game will come when the True Villain reveals himself and you're able to convince the stooges you're all on the same side. They won't help you out any more successfully than they helped the antagonist, but at least you won't have to fight them any more.

Avoidable: Yes
Reccommend: Maybe. Sometimes you're better off without an evil henchman, other times it's just needed.

Thousand Year Rule
The Ancient Evil returns to savage the land every thousand years on the dot, and the last time it showed up was just about 999.9875 years ago. Despite their best efforts, heroes of the past were never able to do more than seal the Evil away again for the future to deal with (which brings up the question of just how exactly does this "sealing away" work anyway, but never mind.) The good news is that this time, the Evil will get destroyed permanently. The bad news is that you're the one who's going to have to do it.

Avoidable: Yes
Reccommend: Yes. Do I need a reason!?

Principle of Narrative Efficiency
If the main villain (or the enemy you've been trying to kill for most of the game before he summons the real final villain) was ever defeated in the past by another group of adventurers, one of them will secretly be in your party and one of them will be the hero's father.

Avoidable: Yes
Reccommend: Yes. You do not need help on how to avoid this one either.

Ayn Rand's Revenge
Outside the major cities, there is no government whatsoever. Of course, perhaps that explains why it's so difficult and dangerous to get anywhere outside the major cities.

Avoidable: Yes
Reccommend: Yes. Makes the world more detailed!

First Law of Travel
Anything can become a vehicle -- castles, cities, military academies, you name it -- so do not be alarmed when the stones of the ancient fortress you are visiting shake underfoot and the whole thing lifts off into the sky. As a corollary, anything is capable of flight if it would be cool, aeronautics or even basic physics be damned.

Avoidable: Yes
Reccommend: Yes. It's been done enough in other games, the complication of trying to implement this would be too dificult.

Second Law of Travel
There will be only one of any non-trivial type of vehicle in the entire world. Thus, only one ocean-capable steamboat, only one airship, and so forth. Massive facilities will have been constructed all over the world to service this one vehicle.

Avoidable: No. If you could avoid it, then it would require a ton of other vehicles to go sailing and flying around.

The only way to travel by land between different areas of a continent will always be through a single narrow pass in a range of otherwise impenetrable mountains. Usually a palace or monastery will have been constructed in the pass, entirely filling it, so that all intracontinental traffic is apparently required to abandon their vehicles and go on foot up stairs and through the barracks, library and throne room to get to the other side. This may explain why most people just stay home. (In some cases a cave or underground tunnel may be substituted for the palace or monastery, but it will still be just as inconvenient with the added bonuses of cave-ins and nonsensical elevator puzzles.)

Avoidable: Not really. You really need to reason exactly why such a thing is in the way. A forest or cave in the way of such a mountain pass would work.

Fourth Law of Travel
Three out of every four vehicles you ride on will eventually sink, derail or crash in some spectacular manner.

Avoidable: Yes
Reccommended: Nah. It would be better if you lost something in your travels.

Fifth Law of Travel
All vehicles can be driven or piloted by anyone. The main character just needs to find out where the bridge or steering wheel is, as he already knows all of the controls.

Avoidable: No. It would be a bit too much of a hassle to counteract this one.

Sixth Law of Travel
Nobody gets to own a cooler ride than you. If you ever do see a cooler vehicle than the one you've got now, at some point before the end of the game you will either take over this vehicle, get something even bigger and better, or else see it destroyed in a glorious blaze.

Avoidable: Yes
Reccommended: Yes, mainly because the second law of travel counteracts this one.

Seventh Law of Travel
When on a voyage to another continent, the journey will last only as long as it takes you to talk to all the other passengers and the captain.

Avoidable: Yes. Make a timer.
Reccommended: No. A timer might not be long enough for all essential conversations.

Eighth Law of Travel
There are no shortcuts, ever -- unless you are forced to take them, in which case they will be much longer and more dangerous than your original route.

Avoidable: Sometimes not.

Last Law of Travel (Big Joe Rule)
As has been described, you must endure great trials just to get from town to town: locating different vehicles, operating ancient transport mechanisms, evading military blockades, the list goes on. But that's just you. Every other character in the game seems to have no trouble getting to any place in the world on a moment's notice.

Avoidable: No. An NPC can't be programmed to show up only after a certain time without much hassle.

If You Meet The Buddha In A Random Encounter, Kill Him!
When you're out wandering around the world, you must kill everything you meet. People, animals, plants, insects, fire hydrants, small cottages, anything and everything is just plain out to get you. It may be because of your rampant kleptomania (see Garrett's Principle.)

Avoidable: Yes
Reccommended: Yes. Try and make random encounters with things like merchants and other travellers! (or don't use random encounters at all.)

Law of Numbers
There will be several items or effects which depend on the numerical value of your hit points, level, etc., which makes no sense unless the characters can see all the numbers in their world and find it perfectly normal that a spell only works on a monster whose level is a multiple of 5.

Avoidable: Yes
Reccommended: Yes. It's just not realistic to have a spell or something driven completley by numeric values in a stat.

That's all for now! Come back another time for numbers 76-100!

[Darkfox]

Simple... here's one that I find annoying:

I feel pretty...
Male character dresses and looks feminine but is either really strong, or really annoying.

Avoidable: Yes
Should it be avoided?: DARN RIGHT! It's one of the stupid things SquareEnix is doing to the latest FF12, this guy, he looked like a pro-wrestler dressed like a woman with a woman's head!

Oh yeah...

 

I Don't Like Gears Or Fighting
There are always giant robots. Always.

An exception is futuristic settings. It's ok for futuristic settings since robots are better at certain things like lookout, sentry, and guard duty being that they can have inhuman senses and abilities to scan their surroundings. This cliche was rather crudely reported. Also it depends on the robot's designs and such.

Btw: You were exagerateing there.

[coasterkrazy]

Originally posted by Bluhman
Henchman Quota (Nana, Saki, and Mio Rule)
One of your antagonists will have three lovably incompetent stooges whom you fight over and over again. Although they're trusted with their boss's most important plans and equipment, they will screw up repeatedly, argue incessantly among themselves, blab secret information, and generally only come out victorious when their job was to be a diversion or a delaying tactic. A high point of the game will come when the True Villain reveals himself and you're able to convince the stooges you're all on the same side. They won't help you out any more successfully than they helped the antagonist, but at least you won't have to fight them any more.

Avoidable: Yes
Reccommend: Maybe. Sometimes you're better off without an evil henchman, other times it's just needed.

*Paper Mario 2 spoilers ahead*
*Paper Mario 2 spoilers ahead*
*Paper Mario 2 spoilers ahead*
Paper Mario 2 did that kind of thing with Beldam, Marilyn and Vivian. The good twist on it, though, was the fact that Vivian joined up with you.
*End Spoilers*
*End Spoilers*
*End Spoilers*

Here's a few more for the long list.

An Empty World...
In so many rpgs, there will be a big world map, with many landscapes, and towns scattered across the map. But the problem is, in a lot of those rpgs, you are the only one even on the map. The map is completely deprived of life except you and the monsters.

Avoidable: Yes
Reccomended: Depends. If you plan on having some merchants and other peopl walking around, then that's fine, but otherwise the map would just be bustling with too many people and it would be kind of crowded.


No Roads Lead to Rome
There are many games with world maps that are completely deprived of roadways. Towns are scattered across, but people will have to journey across the fields, forests, and mud to get around.

Avoidable: Yes
Reccomended: For the most part, yes. If you have a modern type of game, make roadways like we have them today (well maybe not as complex, but you get the idea). If it isn't modern, make stone roadways or dirt paths. Anything of the sort. It sometimes gets to me when there's just grass, trees, water, and mountains, but no roads.


Stop at the Nearest Town
In pretty much every rpg, towns are spread out. If you think about, there usually isn't a town surrounded by a vast amount of land before another town. Towns usually aren't isolated like that.

Avoidable: No. It'd be extremely difficult to weld together a world where everything is interlinked, buildings are everywhere, and fields and forests don't take up so much space.


World Map
There's usually always a place in the game where you exit an area onto a world map. Really, what's a world map? Some birds-eye view type of place where you can see mini versions of towns, forests and caves, then when you go to them you enter a life-sized area?

Avoidable: Yes
Reccomended: Up to you really! I think games with or without world maps can be fun.


That's all from me right now.

[Darkfox]

 

World Map
There's usually always a place in the game where you exit an area onto a world map. Really, what's a world map? Some birds-eye view type of place where you can see mini versions of towns, forests and caves, then when you go to them you enter a life-sized area?

Avoidable: Yes
Reccomended: Up to you really! I think games with or without world maps can be fun.

The world map is done actually as a conservative thing, so players don't have to constantly travel area after area which can get monotinous after a while... or very quickly for vast world games. Unless you plan to make some kind of teleportation system, use a world map because if people have to walk through the same paths over and over, with the same monsters... for a long time... to get somewhere... people lose interest rather quickly.

[CoolZidane]

Step 1: Wreak havoc on world; Step 2: Um.....
When a villain has obtained his ultimate power and has taken over the world, they simply take this opportunity sit on their throne and do nothing for 10 hours, possibly to relax. This relaxation may explain why the heroes beat them so easily.

Avoidable: Yes
Recommended: Definitely. Make your villain more kick-*** by having him go out (or stay in his castle) and do things with his power.


I'll Mourn Later
When the heroes parents are killed, they hero never buries them or holds a funeral. Apparently, RPG bodies decompose very quickly.

Avoidable: Yes
Recommended: Yes. Simply have the hero bury his parents. It adds time (and a possibly emotional scene) into your game.


ADD
Whenever the heroes are doing a sidequest, none of them ever stops to think that they shouldn't waste their time doing this when they could be stopping the villain.

Avoidable: Yes
Recommended: No. All this would do is annoy people.

[Grandy]

Are You Sure We Didn't Met Before?
 Villains and heros are aways interlinked by:
 A - Blood. Father and son, brother and sister, cousins, you choose it, we have it.
 B - Magic. You're the choosen one to defeat him or her. How do I know that? Well, its MAGIC!
 C - Adventures. Hero and villain were in the same war and fought togheter until the second decided to turn evil.
 D - Flashbacks. I really don't need to explain this one.
 E - Friendship. It isn't as common as the others, but I've saw many games where the hero and villain are good friends.
 Avoidable: Yes
 Recommended: Maybe. "A", "B" and "D" are really annoying for me, but I like the concept of friends having to fight for whatever reason they are, even if they don't like it.

 No Fashion Sense. (Suikoden's NPC Rule)
 No NPC can or shall use any clothes that express any kind of individuality. All they must look alike dress alike, the exeption are heroes and villains.
 Avoidable: Yes.
 Recommended: Maybe... Try to do some different NPCs, it isn't like the girl that lives next to the hero door must be JUST LIKE the girl that live in the hidden village in the middle of the forest at the other side of the world.

 There Was A Time On The Future...
 Every sage has a book or knows a profecy where another sage wrote about a chosen one. The chosen one is you, and the sage knew that since the first time he saw you, because the book describes you anatomically, your personality, phone number and E-MAIL.(I'MAHERO@heroesguild.gaia).
 Avoidable: Yes
 Recommended: YES. Or at least, put a explanation of HOW they got this information, maybe you'll travel to the past and tell that yourself, but explain.

 I'll Call It... FireRock! (Pokemon Name Rule)
 All the magics / enemies are named after what they do or are. If a magic is of the element Fire, it'll be called "Fire" the second magic of the element Fire will be "Fire2" or "Fira", not much of a change, uh?
 Avoidable: Yes
 Recommended: ...yes, I think it is, unless you don't have a drop of imagination, then you should think in better names.

[Cerebus]

What are you doing with money?
Every monster you fight have money...Fish have money, crocodile have money, bee have money... What are they doing with money?

Avoidable : Yes
Recommended : Maybe...But finding money will be much harder...

Are they clones?
Every same kind of monster have the same stats, and the same ammount of money.

Avoidable : Yes
Recommended : No, creating more of the same monster just to change their stats and money will take too much time.

Poor new commer.
Every party member you get, even if they've already been with you, come with no money...It's not like you're the only one bringing money!

Avoidable : Yes
Recommended : Yes, you should get some money when you get new member. And maybe loose some when a member quit the party.

You were waiting for me?
No matter how many days you spend at the INN, how much time you fight aor wait doing nothing, the villain's achievement will always be done or almost when the hero arrive.

Avoidable : No, I don't think so...