Castle Of Shadows

[C-56]

Just to let you know this is my frist game, so don't expect it to be good...

BGS:
A 50 year war between humans and the undead has taken a turn for the worse with the death count at 3,000 and raising every day people don't know what to do any more.  The war was started when humans tried to enter the castle of shadow, or the land of the dead.  Now when humans die instead of entering the castle of  shadows and passing on, their souls remain and turn into undeads which attack the living.
Toons:
Zeek
Male
21-27
Rekz's older brother he is sent to fight in the war and after 6 years his brother still hasn't heard from him.
Rekz
Male
8-14
The hero of the story, after losing his mother and father to the war, and then having his only living relitive, his brother Zeek, go off to fight in the war, he is left orphaned.  He one day gets a letter from his brother 6 years after he had left for the war and this is where the story starts.
Lakus
Female
16
Lakus's mother died after she gave birth to her and her farther died in the war leaving her an orphan.  She befriends Rekz and they look after on another.
(Thats all i got done so far, i'll post more later)
Screens:

 

[Bluhman]

Originally posted by C-56

Screens:
 

Okay... Uhh... How should I put this? That house is a bit physically impossible. The maps need a bit of work. Make sure your maps look visually pleasing by spreading less uniform landforms all over them. That way, the map can end up being less repetitive and more rewarding to the eye.

Second, the story doesn't really do anything new. True, there's not much wrong with that, but a game can really greatly benefit from a well-devised story. If the story is cliche, and is comparable to other things people have played, they probably won't want to play the game, since it's about a typical topic that could possibly have been carried out better by another game.

As a word of reassurance, though, rarely will a person's first game be good. RPG making requires trial, error, and persistance and skill. Keep going on, no matter what the other peoples might say, and you can end up with some rather inovative, and good games.

Finally, Hello, you silly fool.