<title></title>: Now spiraling out of control... crappy, serious or I dunno...

[MissingName]

 
This game started out as a crappy game, but now I don't know what to call it.  Weeoo.

WARNING - THE GAME WILL CONTAIN:
Strong language, drug use, blood, gore, cats, bad jokes and cliches.

The story so far:

     Alex the lawn gnome lives in the very creatively named village of Gnometown.  (Well, you can call him Alex if you want, but that's his default name.)  It's almost time for the Mushroom Festival but unfortunately our hero has forgotten to gather his shrooms.  So, without further ado, he sets out to find his mushrooms in time for the festival.  He finds them... only to find out that [spoiler].  
     Alex leaves the village with tears in his eyes.  He looks behind him, pauses, and decides to do it.
     "GOODBYE, YOU F*CKERS!  SEE YOU IN HELL!!!!!!!"
     And with that he switches the safety off, opens the cover and twists the lever.  Gnometown disappears in a cloud of fire.

     - One month later -

     Alex arrives at Gnometown again.
     "... how the f*ck did they rebuild it?"

Assorted stuff:

DEMO:
http://www.mediafire.com/download.php?nlzmyzhyttd

[supasora]

I like cats. this sounds like an intreasting crappy game. It bothers me how some people get upset with games like this.

[fruckert]

For a second there, I though <title></title> was a typo.

[Ben]

cats....i watched drak's review of ryumagicsuperacademywinryuryumagic and giggled. Except when he talked. Just the meows and the swears. Thats all I needed.

But I digress.

Tell me more about your cats

[MissingName]

(Each set of "" is a separate message box.)

"The cat attacks."

"You have been eaten by the cat."

"The cat explodes."

"The cat scratches you to death."

"The cat meows you to death."

"The cat opens up a portal."

"The cat trips a mine, exploding you."

"You have been f***ed by the cat."  A tribute to the Crappy Dinner Game.

"The cat calls someone on his cellphone."
*ten minutes later*
"CAT BOMB!  MEOW MEOW MEOW MEOW MEOW MEOW MEOW!" "You die."

"MEOW MEOW MEOW MEOW MEOW MEOW MEOW!"


"MEOW!" "MEOW!" "MEOW!" "MEOW!" "MEOW!" "MEOW!" "MEOW!" "MEOW!" "MEOW!" "MEOW!" "MEOW!" "MEOW!" "MEOW!" "MEOW!" "MEOW!" "MEOW!" "MEOW!" "MEOW!" "MEOW!" "MEOW!" "MEOW!" "MEOW!" "MEOW!" "MEOW!" "MEOW!" "MEOW!" "MEOW!" "MEOW!" "MEOW!" "MEOW!" "MEOW!" "MEOW!" "MEOW!" "MEOW!" "MEOW!" "MEOW!" "MEOW!" "MEOW!" "MEOW!" "MEOW!" "MEOW!" "MEOW!" "MEOW!"

"M" "E" "O" "W" "M" "E" "O" "W" "M" "E" "O" "W" "M" "E" "O" "W" "M" "E" "O" "W" "M" "E" "O" "W" "M" "E" "O" "W" "M" "E" "O" "W" "M" "E" "O" "W" "M" "E" "O" "W" "M" "E" "O" "W" "M" "E" "O" "W" "M" "E" "O" "W" "T" "H" "E" "G" "A" "M" "E" "O" "W" "M" "E" "O" "W" "M" "E" "O" "W" "M" "E" "O" "W" "M" "E" "O" "W" "M" "E" "O" "W" "M" "E" "O" "W" "M" "E" "O" "W" "M" "E" "O" "W" "M" "E" "O" "W" "M" "E" "O" "W" "M" "E" "O" "W" "M" "E" "O" "W" "M" "E" "O" "W" "M" "E" "O" "W" "M" "E" "O" "W" "M" "E" "O" "W" "M" "E" "O" "W" "M" "E" "O" "W" "M" "E" "O" "W" "M" "E" "O" "W" "M" "E" "O" "W" "M" "E" "O" "W" "M" "E" "O" "W" "M" "E" "O" "W" "M" "E" "O" "W" "M" "E" "O" "W"  "M" "E" "O" "W" "M" "E" "O" "W" "M" "E" "O" "W" "M" "E" "O" "W" "M" "E" "O" "W" "M" "E" "O" "W" M" "E" "O" "W" "The cat explodes."

I'm still trying to make a list of really annoying things for the cat to do.



Expect a visit from WEEGEE!, the Spy, G-man, [name removed to instill some kind of anticipation], random people I found pictures of on google images, [name removed to instill some kind of anticipation], PILLS HERE PILLS HERE PILLS HERE Louis, Vince with his ShamWow, [name removed to instill some kind of anticipation], Cloud, Squall, Pikachu, [name removed to instill some kind of anticipation], James Bond, Harry Mason, Tom Hanks, Bruce Willis, [name removed to instill some kind of anticipation], Ben Kingsley, [name removed to instill some kind of anticipation]...   Tell me who else you want to see.  Doesn't mean I'll listen to you.

BUT WAIT!  That's not all.  Send a $3 bill with your name, picture and personality type to
[spoiler=this address:]

LWCM MissingName
2113 The Game Rd.
Centralia, PA. 17927

[/spoiler]
and YOU can show up somewhere in this game.  Deadline is Saturday, August 29th at 6:00 in the morning.

...I dunno.  In all seriousness, this project's big enough already.

Should I keep Billy Mays in there?  I started this project before he was dead and then forgot about it.

[Muraiko]

He might haunt you...
spoooooky...

[MissingName]

I guess I'll keep him in there.  He'll sell you OxiClean, a magical item that does... stuff.

There will be four zones in the demo.  They are Gnome Village, Mountain Summit, Mountain Forest and Mountain Field.  So far, only the village is completed.

Collecting mushrooms will be like collecting fruit in Zuhane's "Gulpy Gulpy!" except without the whole "ARUGA!" thing.  Even though that was one of the most annoying things I've heard.

A fruit stand has been added to the village!  


Don't forget the mines, either.  (Mr. Owl is still trying to eat his Tootsie Pop, so Mr. Lion will be filling in for him.


...and lost the game.

Who remembers the dying donkey sound effect from Dragonium's "LSD Quest" games?  I found it.  Ha ha ha...

[MissingName]

Had to get a reference picture of a computer monitor.  I go online and find:

You bastard! That sound... It still gives me nightmares.

Might as well use this one here too.
[spoiler=click here]
Good thing about clicking: You got a sound
Bad thing: You lost the game  FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF[/spoiler]

Oh, THAT sound.  Already have it, but I forgot to put it to good use... thanks for reminding me.  Heh heh heh...

MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHGAMEAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!

There won't be any real battles in the demo.  So you really don't have to worry about picking up money or buying items.

[MissingName]

I can't believe I actually finished the demo today.  But I finished one of my school assignments and felt I deserved a break...

Here it is:
NOTHING! ABSOLUTELY NOTHING!  THE DEMO IS IN FOR REPAIRS.

Notes:
 - This is a RAR file, about 18mB.  Unzip to the projects section of your RM2k3 directory.
 - PLEASE DON'T LOOK THROUGH THE FILES UNTIL AFTER YOU HAVE BEATEN THE GAME!  It will give things away.  Also, please don't look at coding or mess with it.
 - You need to delete the save files.  They won't work well.
 - Contains strong language.
 - Billy Mays and Vince Offer are referenced in the gameplay but don't actually appear...
 - Some things may seem completely unoriginal.  Oh well.
 - I left the save function in because I felt like being nice in the demo.  
 - Real reason: I forgot to remove it.  Enjoy my fail while you fail.\
EDIT: I now realize this game is very unoriginal.  
And I tried to make something new...

Some hints (don't be an @$$hat!):
[spoiler]PM me if you want a walkthrough. But I'm still writing it...[/spoiler]
[spoiler]The game[/spoiler]
[spoiler]You won't get a message saying you found a mushroom.  You'll hear a shuffling noise instead.[/spoiler]

[SaiKar]

How the HAIL do you have a 18 MB demo that you threw together in like a day in a half when my largest game project that I've been working on for almost 10 years and has like 25 hours of gameplay is at 8.18 MB in RAR form?

Man, I don't even want to know what you've tossed in that file.

[MissingName]

How the HAIL do you have a 18 MB demo that you threw together in like a day in a half when my largest game project that I've been working on for almost 10 years and has like 25 hours of gameplay is at 8.18 MB in RAR form?

The dying donkey sound effect alone is 4.3 MB.  Add in some wav format music...
Oh, the file is 20-25 MB uncompressed.  Just to let y'all know...

Man, I don't even want to know what you've tossed in that file.

Complete **** and annoyance.

I now realize this game is very unoriginal. 
And I tried to make something new...

[MissingName]

Taking down the demo link.  I am going to modify it and make it more original.

 - I will try to add in Billy Mays and Vince Offer.
 - Battles!
 - More custom graphics.
 - More sound effects and annoying music.

Immediate EDIT: I realize this will also FFFF up two other files.  They weren't really important anyway.

[supasora]

ARRHG!! I NEED LAWN GNOMES!!! And kitties... AND Billy Mays...

[fruckert]

FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU-
...
This is very disappointing.

[MissingName]

Don't worry.  I need to some up with some really original death traps and other annoyances.

And the Billy Mays sprite is almost done.  I just need to finish making him walk.  I'm keeping the crappy gnome sprite, though.  It fits the mood perfectly.