Charas Pub

[Drace]

Daredevil: What the hell is going on here.
Spiderman: There stupid.
Hulk: HULK SMASH BAR!!!

[WarxePB]

Warxe: Where have I been?
*looks around*
You guys're having problems with the Justice League? Let me handle it.
*summons floating fortress and climbs inot it*

*1 hour later*
Drake: I TOLD you this was the right place!
Warxe: But there's at least 20 impenetrable fortresses in this area! *points to said castles*
Odin: This one has "Justice League" on the front.
Zero: -_-
...Wait, why am I not at the bar?
Seph: In any case...
*fires a missile at J.L.F.*
Batman: Hey!
The Flash: They're attacking us!
Warxe: We need backup!
*summons other floating fortress*
Xios: The destruction of the Justice League will bring me one step closer to ruling the world!
Bob: Vherr is zee Joostece Legue?
Xios: Right there.
Bob: Oh.
Kratos: We should assault it now.
Xios: Warxe, are you ready?
Warxe: Sure.
*Both floating fortresses fire many missiles at the J.L.F*
*It does nothing*
Warxe: D'oh!
Shado: We could just press that button.
*points to a button on the side of the J.L.F that says "PRESS ME"*
Warxe: Good idea!
*summons a giant hand that presses the button*
*castle blows up*
Xios: That was easy.
Odin: -_- *there's another castle beneath the first*
Superman: We're always prepared! *eyelasers Warxe*
Xios: Retreat!

*back in the pub*

Warxe: Well, that went over well.
Kratos: Indeed.
Zero: Time to get drunk! *falls behind bar*
Xios: What happened to the rest of my team?
Warxe: They said they were going "out".
Hulk: HULK SMASH BLUE MAN! *smashes Warxe*
Xios: Great...
Kratos: No, Hulk. Not today.
Hulk: Sorry... *blows Warxe up like a flattened cartoon character*

[Araloth]

Araloth: well i hope hes not into smashing green men today.
*one day passes, and the hulk leaves*
Araloth: Phew...

*superman comes in and smashes him*

[Darkfox]

NHP: *looks at Warxe laying unconcious* Warxemon, you don't look too well... looks like I'll have to perform mouth-to-mouth recetuationinnn... or... whatever! *walks over to Warxe and gets close to his face*

Warxe: *opens his eyes* AGHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!

NHP: *falls over backwards* Hey, what do you know? It worked! ^_^

[Drace]

Drace: Ummm .... is he gay? Cause we have a female lifeguard over there.

[WarxePB]

Xios: Bartender! I demand you get me and Kratos a beer this instant!
Razor: Or?
Xios: *possesses Red and sends him after Razor* I'll have him eat you.
Razor: NO! ANYTHING BUT THAT! *gets Xios and Kratos beers*
El Prez: I want two for me and Uncle Sam!
Razor: I can't give beer away for free! I'm already a million gil in debt!
Uncle Sam: *flexes threateningly*
Razor: Alright, fine. *serves beer*
Kratos: Actually, I'd like some wine. *gives Razor a sack of gold*
Razor: *gets Kratos a bottle of wine, then dances with the bag of gold*
Kratos: *whispers to Xios* He doesn't know that it's only gold-covered chocolate
Xios: *sniggers*
*Odin walks in*
Warxe: Hey, where's the rest of the TOW?
Odin: Playing blackjack in the fortress.
*looks at Razor* I want the hardest liqour you have.
Razor: Got the money?
Odin: *hands Razor some coins*
Razor: *gives Odin a bottle labeled "Alcohol Poisioning in a Bottle"*
Warxe: You're gonna die if you drink that.
Odin: Quiet, Warxe. *decapitates Warxe*
NHP: Oh no! Warxemon is hurt! *sews Warxe's head back on*

[Drace]

Drace: Kadamn stupid creatures here. Send them away or I'll leave and take .... ummmm ...... Red with me.
Red: Yeah!
Razor: Ok, Warxe gang will you please leave.
Odin: *decapitates warxe* Dare to ask that one more time!
Razor: They wont leave.
Drace: Fine, Red come. Where going somewhere else.
*20 days later Drace and Red return*
Razor: Well, found something?
Drace: Well we have travelled a long road for 4 days till we came by the mountains. There we found a guy named Yapolugade who had a search party to find a yeti.
Red: Drace and I went with them but the party got seperated while we where attacked by a dragon.
Xen:*In his thoughts* I thought those guys looked familiar.
Drace: So with a group of five we went to search on, for the yeti and the others. We found the tracks of a yeti and tracked it down. 5 days later we found some of the others. With them we continued the search and found it the next day. We sneeked up to it and captured.
Red: Well now comes the funny part. It appeared to be Peklo who got lost in the mountains.
*silence*
Warxe: Well then.
Drace: We'll knowing of the 1 biljon reward on his head we said we take him to the pub and actually brought him to the police to recive our reward.
Razor: Well what did you do the other 10 days?
Red: With the money we went to Hawaii, bought it, transferred it next to the pub 9 days later and spend the money on hot chicks and the best beer around.
Razor: I wondered why there where palmtrees all of a sudden here.
Darkfox: How much did buying and moving Hawaii cost?
Drace: 1 gil.
*Silence*
Razor: So you spend 999.999.999 gil on chicks and beer.
Drace: Well only 100.000.000 on the chicks. Just check your storage for what and how many beer you have.
*walks to the storage room*
*comes running back in*
Razor: **** it! It's sssjit beer.
All drinkers: WHOOHOO!!!

[El Presidente]

*Meanwhile, in the dark depths of Fortress Donut King...*

El Prez: My plans are well and truly underway... Uncle Sam, how many flying monkeys did you actually find again?
US: Four mi'lord.
El Prez: Show them to me.
*US holds up a mouse, a squirrel, some roadkill and a rather large bottle cap*
El Prez: Hmm, we could be in trouble for our first mission, attack the new bar in Hawaii!

El Prez: We're here! *throws bottle cap and hits Razor*
Razor: Ow! *Pulls out shotgun*
El Prez: *Pulls out Bazooka*
Razor: *Pulls out laser*
El Prez: *Pulls out armed Nuclear warhead*
Razor: *Pulls out board with nail in it*
El Prez: Damn them! That Razor chap has thwarted our plans once more!
US: *Pulls out board with nail in it*
El Prez: No, its no use Samuel. They would return with bigger boards and bigger nails, we are not fit to take that kind of arsenal on. But one day they will make a board with a nail in it so big, that it will destroy the world! Mwuahahahah! *runs off into bushes*

Drace: *continues doing what he was doing before* Eww, a bug.

[Darkfox]

NHP: By the way...

"Whelp Breath"

*Drace is scorched by a stream of flames*

NHP: I'm a girl.

Drace: *cough* Gotcha... *collapses*

Darkfox: *Puts Warxe's head back on* You lose your head more than Red!
Red: Yeah! And I lose it alot... thanks to some certain sombodies...
Darkfox: Eheh...

[Razor]

*an Irishman, Scotsman and an Englishman walk in, up to the bar*
Razor:...is this some kind of joke?
Guy on drums: Ba da dish!
*silence*
Scotsman: We filled our part of the deal, laddie, now pay us!
Razor: Joke didn't work, I don't have to pay.
Irishman: We never agreed to that! Pay up!
Razor: Grr *grumble* fine. Here *writes out cheque*
Irishman: Hot dog! I'll buy 6 beers *slams down cheque*
Englishman: Give me that *snatches it* let's go, chaps. *they leave*
Razor: Heheheh, jokes on them, that cheque is fake!

[Drace]

Razor: I wonder, did you bring Pearl Harbor with you?
Drace: Yes why?
Razor: Cause there gonna attack it today.
Drace: Oh, ok.
*5 secs*
Drace and Razor: HOLY ****!!!!

[Razor]

Razor: *in real life* Now let's pretend that post never existed.
Darkfox: *also in RL* agreed.

[El Presidente]

*Uncle Sam in a Japanese fighter jet*
El Prez: Now go attack Pearl Harbour!
US: Duh, okie-dokie boss.
*Takes off and lands on Fortress Donut King*
El Prez: You blubbering babboon! You have destroyed my empire!
*Pulls out suitcase. Suitcase folds into Fort Knox*
El Prez: This will have to do.

[WarxePB]

Xios: *looks at passed-out figure of Odin*
Warxe: I told him...
Xios: Warxe, how is it that you can revive yourself?
Warxe: Must be the environment. I can't do that back on Shoruth.
Kratos: I would hope not.
Warxe: And that's supposed to mean!?
Kratos: Quiet, Warxe. *attempts to decapitate Warxe, but fails due to the neckbrace aorund his neck*
Warxe: Ha ha HA!
Kratos: *sigh* *impales Warxe*
Xios: *possesses Warxe, and turns him all zombie-like*
Finally, I have my truly invincible warriror! I shall rule all with him! *walks out of pub, laughing hysterically*
Kratos: You forgot Warxe.
Xios: I knew that! Come, my humble minion!
Warxe: Guhhhh.... *falls apart*
NHP: That can't be good...
Xios: *mumbles something, and walks away*

[David]

David: -walks in, Mindlessly Takes Three beers, pops the caps off, and drinks them. Knocked unconcious-