Charas Pub

[Red Giant]

Red: Hey... there's a pub here now.
Razor: Wha? You went to hell?
Red: No! I work here.
Satan: HEY! Get back to work you festering heap of dung!
Red: ... That's a sign of respect.
Satan: Now he's out of the way... Let's see what I have in store for YOU. *Advances*
Razor: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!

...

Don't pinch me!
Satan: Heheh. I'm actually gonna kill you now. 'Cuz I'm satan.

[Me5kuTis]

Me5kuTis(In MT11's Stomach) : Let me out !!!
Satan : Not until it's grillin' time!
Me5kuTis(In MT11's Stomach) : Noooooo!
...
...
...
Me5kuTis(In MT11's Stomach) :  Hey I found a cookie!
Satan : Noez! That's the cookie someone sold their soul for.
Me5kuTis(In MT11's Stomach) : I'll eat it!
Satan : But it's already been eaten.
Me5kuTis(In MT11's Stomach) : What's your point?
Satan : (-_-')
Me5kuTis(In MT11's Stomach) : You can buy it from me.
Satan : Really ? How much!?
Me5kuTis(In MT11's Stomach) : Let's see.. one cookie.. that will be..  one GETOUTOFSOMEONESSTOMACHFREECARD.
Satan : *Whispers* heh, I would pay 300 times that for anything sweet in hell, cause all I can get here is sweat.
Me5kuTis : *snickers*
Me5kuTis : NO WAIT! I changed my mind. I'll take 300 of GETOUTOFSOMEONESSTOMACHFREECARDs.
Satan : Crap! Deal! Hand it over.
Narrator(In MT11's Stomach) :  And that's how Me5kuTis went out of MT11's stomach. Although he wasn't so smart. He could have bought a GETOUTOFHELLFREECARD and a GETOUTOFSOMEONESSTOMACHFREECARD for that cookie. Oh well
I guess he w-.. Gah AAAAARGH AAAAAH .... Getting digusted!!! AAAAAaaaaaa......
MT11 : where's the bathroom?!111oneone11!!11eleven!
Me5kuTis : ..
Me5kuTis : NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO*pant* *pant* *pant* OOOOOOOO!!!!

[Razor]

Satan: That post hurt my eyes. *smacks Me5kuTis into lava*
Me5kuTis: OH EM GEE IT BURNS AND I CAN'T DIE BECAUSE I'M ALREADY IN HELL SO I'LL JUST SUFFER INSTEAD OH THE PAIN, OH THE PAIN OF IT ALL.
Razor: Eheheh.
Satan: As for you, to the chamber of horrifying/painful/degrading tortures!
Razor: .o_o. *gets thrown into a room of the same name*

[Kinslayer]

Still drunk, KS runs into Satan

Satan: Who the heaven are you?

KS: I am... THE WISHMASTER!!!!! WHAT DO YOU WANT...*HICUPS*...?! WHAT DO YOU WISHHHHHH?! I CAN MAKE IT HAPPEN!!!!!! BOOOOOHHHH!!!! *belch (vomits on Satan's T-Shirt)*

Satan: I don't want no drunks messin' in my Hell!!! Get out!!!

KS: Why isn't that special...?! Could you be... SATAN???!!!

Satan: Of course I'm ****ing Satan!!!!

KS: Then "Mister Satan" do you know something?
**** YOU!!! YOU ROBBED MAH WIFE, YA BASTARD!!!!

Satan: Hey, you are drunk.

KS: *slaps Satan's face* Don't you dare to tell me that I'm drunk, mister red man *hips*. Now get out!!!

Satan: But It's my Hell...

KS: GET OUT!!!!!!

*Satan runs crying to his room*

[Me5kuTis]

Me5kuTis : Wow.. Anyone up for bashing the door that leads to earth?

[Moosetroop11]

MT11: Aye! *Everyone starts using MT11 as a battering ram to knock down the door* Here we go!

[Kinslayer]

KS: *Now normal with headache* Sheez!!! What a party... Where am I? Why are they usingh MT11 to knock out that door full of fire? And why is there a devil crying?...!!! Gotta get out! *starts helping*

[Razor]

Originally posted by Moosetroop11
Red: "I could go to Hell and meet other Fiends!"

(Dude, page 45)

Red: I think I'll go do that now.

Red: Hello there!
Demon1: I WILL DEVOUR YOUR SOUL.
Red: Nice to meet you.
Demon2: YOUR LIFE IN HELL IN BURN FOR ETERNITY.
Red: That's, uh, great.
Demon1: I SHALL DESTROY YOU.
Red: Uhh, you know what, I'm gonna go now.
Demon2: RESISTANCE IS FUTILE.
Dalek: EXTERMINATE. DESTROY. DESTROY.
Dragonium: lol
FFL: ASPLODE
*illogic*


Razor: How was it?
Red: Not as good as I'd though. Hey, weren't you being tortured?
Razor: No!!! *Satan drags Razor by the legs back into torture room*
Red: Oh that's good then.

[Darkfox]

Mini Puppet Red on Red's shoulder: They love you here Red! Your Number 1!!
Mini Pupper Red on Red's shoulder 2: AND WE LOVE YOU RED!!

Red: OMG! And I can't make an expression of fear!! AGHHH!!! HORROR!!!

*Red wakes up in a sweat*

Razor: He got quite a bump on the head, we kinda thought there for a minute he was going to leave us.

Red: But I did leave you, Razor that's
just the trouble.  And I tried to get back
for days and days.

MT11: There, there, lie quiet now. You just had a bad dream.

Red: No

White: Sure, remember me? your old pal, White?

Drace: And me Hickory? Er I mean... Drace...

Satan: You couldn't forget my face, could you?

Red: AGHHHH!! *looks away* No. But it wasn't a dream it was a place. *points at Darkfox* you were there... *points at Razor* and you... and you! *FFL, Dragonium, Grandy, Warxe, Odin, etc...* and... *points at NIKEY* I dunno who you are...

NIKEY: Nobody ever does...

Red: And... *notices two puppets* AGHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!

[Drace]

Razor: Hey! Don't you remember?
Red: No?
Razor: Those puppets are your children.
Red: Eh? Who's my wife then?
*Richard Simmons enters*
Red: *Gasp* NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOoooooooooooooooooo!!!!
*from behind Richard Simmons comes a beautifull woman*
Red: *Gasp* YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!!!!!!
*from behind the beautifull lady comes a fat, ugly woman*
Red: Is that my mother in law?
Beautifull Woman: Uhmmm... I am, that's your wife.

[Razor]

"...and Red screamed for the next 52 hours." Razor closed the book. "Now, when the Hell are we gonna get customers?"
Weregnome shrugged whilst drinking from his bottle of Canadian Club. "More CC for me."
A moment of silence went through the pub, before Razor replied; "We only have Doritos."
Weregnome just shook his head slowly. "Idiot..."





OOT
Red: Oh you did not just do that again.
Razor: Yes! Whahaha! Once again, it turns out that everything that happened, did not happen! Whahaha!
Red: I'm going to kill you in your sleep.
Razor: Ahha, ahha, heheh, haaa... alright, that was sort of creepy.
Red: *looming* maybe I won't wait till then...
Razor: Stop that. Please.

[Bluhman]

*Bluhman crashes in from the roof*

Bluhman: I'll have some punch.

Razor: We only have doritos.

Bluhman: Good thing I brought my punch!

Razor: Really now? Can I have some?

Bluhman: Ok! *Bluhman throws a good, solid hook that sends weregnome hurdling through the roofhole that Bluhman made.*

Razor: OW! That was my Weregnome!

Bluhman: No. That... was my BLUHMAN... PUNCH!!! *Bluhman throws a punch so powerful, it knocks Razor out of the pub.*

Bluhman: ... ... *Flees from the pub.*

[Razor]

Red Giant: ...and that was the last time Razor used the book gag. Or else.
Razor: Aww.
*inane activities in Hell continue*

[WarxePB]

-Warxe: *to a demon* Soo... you're a demon. How's that going for you?

-Demon: Eh, it's alright, but the pay sucks...

-Warxe: Too bad. Hey, you wanna be my bodyguard?

-Demon: Why would you need a bodyguard?

-Odin: *out of nowhere* ZANTETSUKEN! *kills Warxe*

-Warxe: ...*gets up* That's why.

-Demon: Well, sure, I guess. What's the pay?

-Warxe: How about $20 an hour?

-Demon: That's fair.

-Warxe: Okay, you start right now. First, go take care of Odin.

-Demon: Can do. *walks over*

-Odin: Huh? What did I do?

-Demon: I'm that blue-haired guy's bodyguard now. And as such, I get to beat on you... *uses magical demon powers to suspend Odin in the air, then he calls a few buddies and they start gang-beating him*

-Xios: I wish I could do that...

-Warxe: You have to bribe them! Mind-control pales in comparison to money.

-Xios: Money is a good idea... but mind-control works so much better.

-Warxe: -_-

[Drace]

Drace: Oh! I can use Mind Control!
Satan: No you can't.
Drace: I can! I sold my 63th soul for that! Remember?
Satan: Ok then. Take over that..... wolf man over there *points at Razor*
Drace: Okay! *Uses MD on Razor*
Razor: What? Hey! Drace needs some free beer!
Satan: You do know that this is not funny.
Drace: Oh, sorry.
Razor: *Smashes head against a counter*
Satan: That's better.